The couch thread

Ross Hunt · Post by **Ross Hunt** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 6:35 pm

Again.

Shafpocalypse Now · Post by **Shafpocalypse Now** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 6:49 pm

Read this astonishing bullshit.

You'll not find me making the claim that CrossFit dilutions are ineffective or impotent. Were it the case that low dosage gave no response, we'd not see the dramatic improvement that we do in beginners. The slope of the CrossFit dose-response curve is steep. My challenge is, and let's be perfectly clear on this, that Mark has not turbocharged the effect nor has he demonstrated, in action or effect, heightened awareness, focus, or understanding of/on technique, all claims to the contrary notwithstanding.

My commitment to discovery, recognition, and implementation of modifications to CrossFit programming is strong, and these mod's have been, and will continue to be, warmly welcomed from any quarter. Evaluation will be, however, and this is important, performance based.

This very site, through the WOD and comments, provides perfect opportunity to demonstrate any claims of programming improvements. Ironically, the very contest that Eric '07 (comment #66) is asking for is being held right here, three days out of four. I'll leave explanation of the dearth of takers to others, but assure yourself that tens of thousands of times have not been posted and not due to humility or the "ego-less pursuit of fitness".

Let me address the above, as I have so many times before:

You'll not find me making the claim that CrossFit dilutions are ineffective or impotent

Bullshit. You just did, and you have done so every time something comes up in the past.

Mark has not turbocharged the effect nor has he demonstrated, in action or effect, heightened awareness, focus, or understanding of/on technique, all claims to the contrary notwithstanding.

Opinion, not fact. The fact here is that Gym Jones folks put it on the line on the mountain, on the trail, and on the mat.

Evaluation will be, however, and this is important, performance based.

This is why many MMAers and BJJ guys don't do Crossfit with you anymore, because you've lost sight that it's the mat that counts, not the WOD.

'll leave explanation of the dearth of takers to others, but assure yourself that tens of thousands of times have not been posted and not due to humility or the "ego-less pursuit of fitness"

Ah, the old "post your time" stuff, all of which is real, like the ridiculous times Gagliardi posted while wearing a weight vest. And soon the "come to XF HQ" challenge will come, with the same old lame "my girls will beat you at a crossfit workout"....this is classic S.A.I.D.

Many of the GJ guys are athletes. Most Crossfitters aren't.

Abandoned by Wolves · Post by **Abandoned by Wolves** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 7:11 pm

nafod wrote:I'm going to start up a new Mongolian-Style Goat Fucking League (MSGFL) so I can be it's best athlete and finally be considered elite. I'm currently working on the S&C protocols.

A man is sitting at a bar, drinking, and he says to no one in particular, "A man can spend his life building bridges. Do they call him John the Bridge Builder? No. A man can spend his life raising crops. Do they call him John the Farmer? No. But you fuck one goat..."

I've only ever enjoyed one other forum thread this much in my ENTIRE life. (That being the thread, "Who would win in a fight, a lion or 40 midgets?" over at PWOT.)

It's like being present during the birth of a legend...

nafod · Post by **nafod** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 7:34 pm

odin wrote:Not to nit-pick with my first post, but Ali-esque performance in any sport is probably beyond the capabilities of 99.999999999999% of the population.

There are many paths to eliteness. I'm counting on the fact that 99.999999999999% of the population won't want to join my Mongolian Style Goat Fucking League (MSGFL). I will be the dominant force.

Edit: I bet I get a better TV contract and higher ratings than Women's Basketball.

odin · Post by **odin** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 8:07 pm

nafod wrote:
odin wrote:Not to nit-pick with my first post, but Ali-esque performance in any sport is probably beyond the capabilities of 99.999999999999% of the population.
There are many paths to eliteness. I'm counting on the fact that 99.999999999999% of the population won't want to join my Mongolian Style Goat Fucking League (MSGFL). I will be the dominant force.

Edit: I bet I get a better TV contract and higher ratings than Women's Basketball.

You're kidding yourself son. Who wouldn't be interested in giving this sport a go? Only gayists or Christians I'll bet.

Let me clarify something though, is it the goat itself or just the fucking that is Mongolian? Also, will you be posting a goat-sex based WOD at this site? I think it could open up marketing possibilities.

For the record, today I did:

'Jenny'

for time: full anal with reach-around until completion. Fingers in the nose of goat counts as instant DQ.

johno · Post by **johno** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 8:13 pm

Batboy2/75 wrote:Unless your goal is @fit, @fit isn't going to do shit to help you achieve your Sport oriented goals.
BB2/75

So, Bats, how suitable do you think xfit is for military uses? Serious question.

IMO, if good form were enforced, it would be superior to cals & running. And easily transportable to the field. (Earlier I posted on the Canucks going xfit.)
But inferior to a good O course.

johno · Post by **johno** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 8:14 pm

Lemon Magic wrote: It's like being present during the birth of a legend...

Word.

Hagbard · Post by **Hagbard** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 8:15 pm

odin wrote:
nafod wrote:
odin wrote:Not to nit-pick with my first post, but Ali-esque performance in any sport is probably beyond the capabilities of 99.999999999999% of the population.
There are many paths to eliteness. I'm counting on the fact that 99.999999999999% of the population won't want to join my Mongolian Style Goat Fucking League (MSGFL). I will be the dominant force.

Edit: I bet I get a better TV contract and higher ratings than Women's Basketball.
You're kidding yourself son. Who wouldn't be interested in giving this sport a go? Only gayists or Christians I'll bet.

Let me clarify something though, is it the goat itself or just the fucking that is Mongolian? Also, will you be posting a goat-sex based WOD at this site? I think it could open up marketing possibilities.

For the record, today I did:

'Jenny'

for time: full anal with reach-around until completion. Fingers in the nose of goat counts as instant DQ.

If you do it at a cliff's edge they push back.

GoDogGo! · Post by **GoDogGo!** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 8:23 pm

Hagbard Celine wrote:
If you do it at a cliff's edge they push back.

Damn, beat me to it. Are we allowed to use the boots with big tops, for putting the goat's back legs into?

GDG!

johno · Post by **johno** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 8:37 pm

GoDogGo! wrote:
Hagbard Celine wrote:
If you do it at a cliff's edge they push back.
Damn, beat me to it. Are we allowed to use the boots with big tops, for putting the goat's back legs into?

GDG!

Like lifting raw vs. suit, it's a matter of federation rules.

Shafpocalypse Now · Post by **Shafpocalypse Now** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 8:53 pm

OK, I just got the definitive info on the infamous 750# deadlift.

Apparently one of Glassman's trainees was a complete freak of nature jujitsu player. He was trained with protocols significantly different than the WOD, and a lot more basic strength movements. This guy was 260# and reliable witnesses report him easily pulling ~700 for a double. This same guy could reportedly free hand climb a 20' rope for 3 repeats with no rest either.

So, freak of nature + lots more strength training = 750# puller

nafod · Post by **nafod** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 9:33 pm

MSGFL training video. Becoming familiar with goats...

Abandoned by Wolves · Post by **Abandoned by Wolves** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 1:56 am

Garm wrote:
Whosonfirst wrote:Why doesn't somebody cross link it to a crossdresser site...really up the count? I don't remember any off-hand.
The official IG default cross-link site is, was, and always will be:

http://www.ouchytheclown.com/

[img:400:266]http://www.ouchytheclown.com/gallery/im ... wo.033.jpg[/img]

OMG, I just became sterile. Thanks a lot, Uncle.

GoDogGo! · Post by **GoDogGo!** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 2:00 am

Lemon Magic wrote:
OMG, I just became sterile. Thanks a lot, Uncle.

Garm left gifts that keep on giving.

GDG!

bill fox · Post by **bill fox** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 2:43 am

nafod is Couch

nafod · Post by **nafod** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 2:56 am

Bill Fox wrote:I'm off to stir some shit.

You asked for it, dumbass. You got it.

Edit: I read back another thread and saw the public wire brushing @ssman gave Hillis. I'm not going to defend that. Say what you want about him.

Pinky · Post by **Pinky** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 4:07 am

Odin sounds like a familiar personality.

szczepan · Post by **szczepan** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 4:12 am

Shaf wrote:OK, I just got the definitive info on the infamous 750# deadlift.

Apparently one of Glassman's trainees was a complete freak of nature jujitsu player. He was trained with protocols significantly different than the WOD, and a lot more basic strength movements. This guy was 260# and reliable witnesses report him easily pulling ~700 for a double. This same guy could reportedly free hand climb a 20' rope for 3 repeats with no rest either.

So, freak of nature + lots more strength training = 750# puller

unless he was pulling 200# or less when he started working with couch and got to 750# in 2 years this is irrelevant. couch is a punk.

Shafpocalypse Now · Post by **Shafpocalypse Now** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 4:34 am

Yeah, I'm just saying that at one point in Greg's career, there was a legit 700 lb deadlifter.

___________ · Post by **___________** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 6:04 am

So does @fit give you AIDS or what?
I don't want' the AIDS unless I'm fucking some hoes up in Africa.

___________ · Post by **___________** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 6:05 am

*****

stosh · Post by **stosh** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 11:56 am

Pinky wrote:Odin sounds like a familiar personality.

Yea, I was thinking so, too.

Batboy2/75 · Post by **Batboy2/75** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 5:19 pm

johno wrote:
Batboy2/75 wrote:Unless your goal is @fit, @fit isn't going to do shit to help you achieve your Sport oriented goals.
BB2/75
So, Bats, how suitable do you think xfit is for military uses? Serious question.

IMO, if good form were enforced, it would be superior to cals & running. And easily transportable to the field. (Earlier I posted on the Canucks going xfit.)
But inferior to a good O course.

IMO none.

Crosstraining however yes.

I refuse to call what I have known for years and what the military has been using since WWII (O course) @fit. @fit is just a bastardation of crosstraining with the addition of a crazy 8 ball WOD, cultish behavior, stupid members, and a broke dick leader.

BB2/75

GoDogGo! · Post by **GoDogGo!** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 6:12 pm

elrodjr wrote: Yea, I was thinking so, too.

Just wanted to let you know, Elrod, that I hear all of your posts in Tom Waits' voice now.

GDG!

Shafpocalypse Now · Post by **Shafpocalypse Now** » Sun Nov 12, 2006 3:25 pm

Here I bring you a statement of phenomenal uselessness:

From today's WOD picture

With correct form functional movements are perfectly safe at post-maximal loads, whereas isolation movements, to name one category of non-functional movements, are potentially unsafe at sub-maximal loads.

Let me paraphrase:

The weight is safe because it's too heavy to lift.

It's not due to her "form", it's due to it's immobility. There are things called the "golgi tendon reflexes" that won't allow a dedicated firing of motor units because it senses it's too heavy...in addition, she probably can't hold onto that, and everyone knows that if your hands can't hold it, your body's not even going to try to lift it.

This is one of the most profoundly stupid things I've ever read on XF, and I've read a lot of misleading and outright wrong stuff.

Let's go on to the comment about "isolation" movements.

Wow. They are potentially dangerous at sub-maximal loads? REALLY? And deadlifts, cleans, squats, presses, snatches, etc ARE NOT?

Oh yeah, this is Greg Glassman we're speaking of with his mythical mental landscape of "virtuosity".

The point is that Nicole will not be able to lift that weight but will not hurt herself because she has good form. Correct lumbar lordosis, shoulders directly over bar, arms vertical, etc.

Check out these standards from ExRx.
http://www.exrx.net/Testing/WeightLifti ... dards.html
If Nicole can deadlift in the region of 250lbs she would be considered an elite lifter.

And of course we know CrossFit athletes do not focus on one aspect of fitness and these standards are only a strength standard. I would imagine most hard core CrossFit athletes might hit the â€œAdvancedâ€