The couch thread

Moku_Nui · Post by **Moku_Nui** » Wed Jun 01, 2011 12:50 am

Yes I Have Balls wrote:pffft

http://board.crossfit.com/showthread.php?t=67528

Bloody torn hands and bloody barbells at Regionals makes CF look dumb.

^Hey, you'll only make gains while you're training and at some Regionals you could get $3000!

Obviously taken out of context, but I did do a double take on the mention of 110%. It was cool when I was in elementary school, giving it 110%. Then my childhood faith was challenged when I learned that 100% is tops and the average person never really accessed all 100% or close to it anyway. Maybe the expression could be "give it 55%!"

(sarcasm)Upon reading the goal of the OP in that link, I am not sure if repackaged, commercially pumped circuit training will ever become mainstream. Oh wait, I forgot how mainstream p90x, 10 min workout, Insanity, and Asylum has gotten. The 60s, 70s, 80s, and 90s might just call for "birther" rights on all of dat. (end sarcasm)

Hymen Asshole · Post by **Hymen Asshole** » Wed Jun 01, 2011 2:56 am

Captain Quack wrote:
terra wrote:
Captain Quack wrote:My practice has received quite a few more than 3 patients, I'll leave it at that. My buddy's kettlebell-focused gym is regularly getting fallout from the local @Fs and other silly bootcampers who are tired of re-injuring themselves.
We don't have an @fit on every corner down here, yet.
Ironically, I was mostly responsible for the early @F infection in my area. One just opened up a two minute walk away from my house.

Fuck, there goes your housing value!

Bobby · Post by **Bobby** » Wed Jun 01, 2011 10:02 am

I sa wat a gym here in Swden that a crossfit class costs around 47 dollars! For 1 class!People must be incredibly stupid to pay that much.Or incredibly rich.

JonnyCat · Post by **JonnyCat** » Wed Jun 01, 2011 2:56 pm

Bobby wrote:I sa wat a gym here in Swden that a crossfit class costs around 47 dollars! For 1 class!People must be incredibly stupid to pay that much.Or incredibly rich.

I don't see how people can go for years and years and not do the math. If a person took some of the cash they spent at a CF box, that person could buy a few pieces of quality equipment and get as good, probably better, workouts for free, for the rest of their life.

Spider Monkey · Post by **Spider Monkey** » Wed Jun 01, 2011 8:53 pm

JonnyCat wrote:
Bobby wrote:I sa wat a gym here in Swden that a crossfit class costs around 47 dollars! For 1 class!People must be incredibly stupid to pay that much.Or incredibly rich.
I don't see how people can go for years and years and not do the math. If a person took some of the cash they spent at a CF box, that person could buy a few pieces of quality equipment and get as good, probably better, workouts for free, for the rest of their life.

Same reason people hire personal trainers, spend fortunes on yoga, pilates, spinning, etc. They are not self-motivated exercisers. They have a fortune in equipment at home that they do not use.

Alfred_E._Neuman · Post by **Alfred_E._Neuman** » Wed Jun 01, 2011 9:21 pm

spider monkey wrote:
JonnyCat wrote:
Bobby wrote:I sa wat a gym here in Swden that a crossfit class costs around 47 dollars! For 1 class!People must be incredibly stupid to pay that much.Or incredibly rich.
I don't see how people can go for years and years and not do the math. If a person took some of the cash they spent at a CF box, that person could buy a few pieces of quality equipment and get as good, probably better, workouts for free, for the rest of their life.
Same reason people hire personal trainers, spend fortunes on yoga, pilates, spinning, etc. They are not self-motivated exercisers. They have a fortune in equipment at home that they do not use.

I read somewhere that only 2% of the population actually exercises of their own volition. The rest, if they give a shit about exercise at all, have to pay someone to motivate them or it'll never get done.

I'm guessing that 2% number has been constant for just about forever. 2% back in the day "exercised" and were athletes. The rest worked hard on the farm or factory and that kept the fat at bay. Now we have the same 2% that enjoy physical exertion and the rest now have office jobs and office ass to go with it.

Yes I Have Balls · Post by **Yes I Have Balls** » Thu Jun 02, 2011 6:12 pm

“The whole point is that you CrossFit your diet, so it needs to be constantly varied, it needs to be functional fuel, and it needs to be prepared to the utmost of efficiency so that we’re willing to do it later,” says Josh Bunch, the owner of Practice CrossFit.

Bunch bases his intake on the Zone Diet developed by Dr. Barry Sears, which advocates a 40:30:30 ratio between carbohydrate, protein and fat. Bunch’s Zone is closer to 12:57:27.

Typical assfit. Everything is the Zone even if it is nothing like the Zone.

http://journal.crossfit.com/2011/06/jos ... ticleTitle

Alfred_E._Neuman · Post by **Alfred_E._Neuman** » Thu Jun 02, 2011 6:23 pm

Yes I Have Balls wrote:
Bunch’s Zone is closer to 12:57:27.
Typical assfit. Everything is the Zone even if it is nothing like the Zone.

The fuck? That's not even 100%. I guess the extra 4% is made up of bullshit.

lasalle · Post by **lasalle** » Thu Jun 02, 2011 8:14 pm

FYI, you're all skinny fat and weak:

Fuckhead sheep wrote: Usually people who hate CrossFit are wannabe endurance “athletes” and I use the term athlete loosely (hence the sarcastic quotation marks). Recreational joggers is a more appropriate term. Skinny, fat, weak…but they can jog 10 miles!

http://blog.skyvisioncenters.com/?p=491

Mountebank · Post by **Mountebank** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 1:25 am

lasalle wrote:FYI, you're all skinny fat and weak:

Fuckhead sheep wrote: Usually people who hate CrossFit are wannabe endurance “athletes” and I use the term athlete loosely (hence the sarcastic quotation marks). Recreational joggers is a more appropriate term. Skinny, fat, weak…but they can jog 10 miles!
http://blog.skyvisioncenters.com/?p=491

...but the couch is skinny, fat, and weak, so it's not much of an accusation to throw around...and regardless of whether couch can run 10 miles or not (he can't), he still has to live up to his old shirtless deadlift competition he threw out there.

Still waiting on anything published anywhere other than their house mag on their "science", or their impact on participants' health by an impartial third party. Still waiting on an actual rhabdo analysis too.

Jay · Post by **Jay** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 1:27 am

90% of the @fit boxes can burn down tomorrow and I wouldn't shed a tear.

So tired of them and their "look at me" bullshit, I mean let's all break our fucking arms patting ourselves on the back for ripping a callous open and STILL training through the pain... WARRIOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

clutch · Post by **clutch** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 12:02 pm

Jay wrote:90% of the @fit boxes can burn down tomorrow and I wouldn't shed a tear.

So tired of them and their "look at me" bullshit, I mean let's all break our fucking arms patting ourselves on the back for ripping a callous open and STILL training through the pain... WARRIOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Warriors do battle, and kill their enemies: that is the sine qua non of being a warrior.

Of all things, I really have a problem with the "Warrior" self-appellation - not only for @fit, but for SM. I cringe every time I hear a yuppie calling themselves a "Warrior" because they lift stupid fucking weights and/or odd objects, whether in training or competition. Yes I realize it feels better to call yourself a "warrior" than to go with the closer-to-home "douchebag", but it's completely disrespectful to those who are, in fact, warriors, and who risk their being on the battlefield - with, like, real guns and ammo.

Jay · Post by **Jay** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 12:14 pm

BobW wrote:
Jay wrote:90% of the @fit boxes can burn down tomorrow and I wouldn't shed a tear.

So tired of them and their "look at me" bullshit, I mean let's all break our fucking arms patting ourselves on the back for ripping a callous open and STILL training through the pain... WARRIOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Warriors do battle, and kill their enemies: that is the sine qua non of being a warrior.

Of all things, I really have a problem with the "Warrior" self-appellation - not only for @fit, but for SM. I cringe every time I hear a yuppie calling themselves a "Warrior" because they lift stupid fucking weights and/or odd objects, whether in training or competition. Yes I realize it feels better to call yourself a "warrior" than to go with the closer-to-home "douchebag", but it's completely disrespectful to those who are, in fact, warriors, and who risk their being on the battlefield - with, like, real guns and ammo.

Agree.... warriors fight, we lift. HUGE difference.

Cave Canem · Post by **Cave Canem** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 1:32 pm

BobW wrote: Of all things, I really have a problem with the "Warrior" self-appellation - not only for @fit, but for SM. I cringe every time I hear a yuppie calling themselves a "Warrior" because they lift stupid fucking weights and/or odd objects, whether in training or competition. Yes I realize it feels better to call yourself a "warrior" than to go with the closer-to-home "douchebag".

Substitute the word "badass" for warrior and you have the same cringe effect. Even in my most zealous @fit days, I'd dry heave at hearing someone called badass because they knocked off a few flying retard pull ups or something.

TerryB · Post by **TerryB** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 1:49 pm

BobW wrote: Yes I realize it feels better to call yourself a "warrior" than to go with the closer-to-home "douchebag", but it's completely disrespectful to those who are, in fact, warriors, and who risk their being on the battlefield - with, like, real guns and ammo.

Gary John · Post by **Gary John** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 2:47 pm

Throw in the complete degradation of the word "hero" into the same pot.

ThespianDouche · Post by **ThespianDouche** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 3:13 pm

Hymen Asshole wrote:
Captain Quack wrote:
terra wrote:
Captain Quack wrote:My practice has received quite a few more than 3 patients, I'll leave it at that. My buddy's kettlebell-focused gym is regularly getting fallout from the local @Fs and other silly bootcampers who are tired of re-injuring themselves.
We don't have an @fit on every corner down here, yet.
Ironically, I was mostly responsible for the early @F infection in my area. One just opened up a two minute walk away from my house.
Fuck, there goes your housing value!

But think of all the short shorted, thick assed chicks that like to show off what they have while carring 20 lb sandbags down your street.

CFB · Post by **CFB** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 3:15 pm

Did I miss these LULZ somewhere in the last few pages?...

http://www.competitor-digital.com/competitor/201106#pg1

And nice tats btw....so now this fucker is native american? I know a few proud, tough-as-fucking-nailz engines that would gladly skin the hide off that white boy.

ThespianDouche · Post by **ThespianDouche** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 3:20 pm

I know anyone who enters a competition is by definiton a "competitior", but wouldn't someone who finishes races be a better cover model?

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 3:23 pm

CFB wrote:Did I miss these LULZ somewhere in the last few pages?...

http://www.competitor-digital.com/competitor/201106#pg1

And nice tats btw....so now this fucker is native american? I know a few proud, tough-as-fucking-nailz engines that would gladly skin the hide off that white boy.

Holland Oates · Post by **Holland Oates** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 3:33 pm

WildGorillaMan wrote:
CFB wrote:Did I miss these LULZ somewhere in the last few pages?...

http://www.competitor-digital.com/competitor/201106#pg1

And nice tats btw....so now this fucker is native american? I know a few proud, tough-as-fucking-nailz engines that would gladly skin the hide off that white boy.

What kind of man brags about squatting 300 pounds?

Mountebank · Post by **Mountebank** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 3:46 pm

Ed Zachary wrote:
WildGorillaMan wrote:
CFB wrote:Did I miss these LULZ somewhere in the last few pages?...

http://www.competitor-digital.com/competitor/201106#pg1

And nice tats btw....so now this fucker is native american? I know a few proud, tough-as-fucking-nailz engines that would gladly skin the hide off that white boy.

What kind of man brags about squatting 300 pounds?

Those who have cultivated a powerlifting background, this is obviously.

Back when I did some triathlons (er, cultivated a triathlete background, yeah that's the ticket!!!), I read in a sport mag that one should only use the term "I'm a triathlete" if they've actually competed at least once in the last year's time.

This would make BMacNCheez unable to claim athlete status of any type, just like the HMIC! Lofty company, it is.

ThespianDouche · Post by **ThespianDouche** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 3:51 pm

Ed Zachary wrote:
WildGorillaMan wrote:
CFB wrote:Did I miss these LULZ somewhere in the last few pages?...

http://www.competitor-digital.com/competitor/201106#pg1

And nice tats btw....so now this fucker is native american? I know a few proud, tough-as-fucking-nailz engines that would gladly skin the hide off that white boy.

What kind of man brags about squatting 300 pounds?

A very small one? I hear that he loaded up a 5 plate squat but had to DNF.

Blocky_Mofo · Post by **Blocky_Mofo** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 5:41 pm

WildGorillaMan wrote:
CFB wrote:Did I miss these LULZ somewhere in the last few pages?...

http://www.competitor-digital.com/competitor/201106#pg1

And nice tats btw....so now this fucker is native american? I know a few proud, tough-as-fucking-nailz engines that would gladly skin the hide off that white boy.

"Broke down from Plantar Fascitis"?? Are you fucking kidding me. Im probably 100 lbs heavier than him, have arches on my feet you can drive under and Ive never "broken down" from Plantar fascitis. It hurts like a motherfucker dont get me wrong..but jeezus whata faggot.

Blocky_Mofo · Post by **Blocky_Mofo** » Fri Jun 03, 2011 5:43 pm

ThespianDouche wrote:
Ed Zachary wrote:
WildGorillaMan wrote:
CFB wrote:Did I miss these LULZ somewhere in the last few pages?...

http://www.competitor-digital.com/competitor/201106#pg1

And nice tats btw....so now this fucker is native american? I know a few proud, tough-as-fucking-nailz engines that would gladly skin the hide off that white boy.

What kind of man brags about squatting 300 pounds?

A very small one? I hear that he loaded up a 5 plate squat but had to DNF.

Win Sir.

IGX

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