How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Topics without replies are pruned every 365 days. Not moderated.

Moderator: Dux

JohnDoe
Staff Sergeant
Posts: 278
Joined: Fri Sep 13, 2013 6:35 pm

How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by JohnDoe » Sun Nov 20, 2016 6:15 pm

I'm not cooking on the day this year, but my Friendsgiving (more of WorkFriends(ish)giving, was a dry brined, spatchcocked (butterflied), smoked 14-16 lb bird. Gravy was a mustard, white wine, giblet gravy, more a sauce, technically I guess, since it wasn't made from drippings.

Last years I did the same, but it was too salty. I butterflied the bird afterI dry brined it, and stupidly re-dry brined it since so much salt came off as I cut it up.

This year's was exceptional, even with a Perdue bird compared to last year's pastured organic bird.

Despite my shelf of cookbooks, everything came off Serious Eats.

Smoked turkey, though I didn't spice rub: http://www.seriouseats.com/recipes/2015 ... ecipe.html

Gravy: http://www.seriouseats.com/recipes/2014 ... ecipe.html

Dry Brining: http://www.seriouseats.com/2014/11/quic ... iving.html

User avatar
syaigh
Sergeant Commanding
Posts: 5678
Joined: Mon Mar 22, 2010 3:29 am
Location: Surrounded by short irrational people

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by syaigh » Sun Nov 20, 2016 6:32 pm

My mom cooks the turkey every year, dry as sawdust.

Im no better, my turkeys are usually still bleeding in spots.

However, When my dad was a middle school principal, his home ec teachers made us a turkey one time tgat they cooked by putting it in a paper bag and burying it in the coals of an outside fire (apparently they made a lot of these). Thats all i know about the process but it was the best turkey i ever had. I have to think it was brined as it was moist and had a lot of flavor. Any ideas?

That ^ by the way looks awesome.
Miss Piggy wrote:Never eat more than you can lift.

User avatar
Shafpocalypse Now
Lifetime IGer
Posts: 21109
Joined: Fri Feb 04, 2005 11:26 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by Shafpocalypse Now » Sun Nov 20, 2016 6:38 pm

In a bag. According to the directions, rubbed with a salt and pepper blend and butter, stuffed with lemons, carrots, celery. Comes out decent every time.

Wanted a smoked turkey this year, but don't have a smoker.

I've fried turkey, and it's very good too, but its a hassle fucking with that much hot oil and that big of a bird.

User avatar
Shafpocalypse Now
Lifetime IGer
Posts: 21109
Joined: Fri Feb 04, 2005 11:26 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by Shafpocalypse Now » Sun Nov 20, 2016 6:39 pm

I agree with syaigh...that butterflied, smoked turkey looks so fucking good I might run out to get a big green egg to smoke one in.

JohnDoe
Staff Sergeant
Posts: 278
Joined: Fri Sep 13, 2013 6:35 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by JohnDoe » Sun Nov 20, 2016 6:46 pm

I just do mine on the Weber. Though the Egg has been calling me for years.

User avatar
WildGorillaMan
Sergeant Commanding
Posts: 9951
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2009 9:01 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by WildGorillaMan » Sun Nov 20, 2016 6:53 pm

I spatchcocked mine this year. It really cuts down on the cooking time, and gets more even doneness throughout.

I brushed butter over the skin and then sea salt and cracked black pepper. Simple and elegant. Turned out great.
Image
You'll Hurt Your Back

basically I'm Raoul Duke trying to fit into a Philip K. Dick movie remake.

User avatar
WildGorillaMan
Sergeant Commanding
Posts: 9951
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2009 9:01 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by WildGorillaMan » Sun Nov 20, 2016 6:55 pm

syaigh wrote:My mom cooks the turkey every year, dry as sawdust.
My idiot mother in law is the kind of old broad who brags about how she "had to" get up at 3am to put the turkey in the oven for a 5pm dinner time.

It's literally inedible unless you drown it in gravy.

Of course nobody tells her she's a shitty cook, instead my idiot in-laws all fawn over it and complement her on it, and perpetuate the cycle of post-mortem animal abuse.
Image
You'll Hurt Your Back

basically I'm Raoul Duke trying to fit into a Philip K. Dick movie remake.

User avatar
syaigh
Sergeant Commanding
Posts: 5678
Joined: Mon Mar 22, 2010 3:29 am
Location: Surrounded by short irrational people

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by syaigh » Sun Nov 20, 2016 7:03 pm

Yeah, she's always surprised we dont want to take any with us.
Miss Piggy wrote:Never eat more than you can lift.

User avatar
buckethead
Sergeant Commanding
Posts: 6631
Joined: Mon Jan 03, 2005 6:25 pm
Location: The Rockies

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by buckethead » Sun Nov 20, 2016 9:13 pm

Fried. 10 years of perfection in a row

User avatar
Dunn
Sergeant Commanding
Posts: 6664
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 4:06 pm
Location: Columbus, GA

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by Dunn » Sun Nov 20, 2016 10:26 pm

Injected with a mix my wife makes and left to sit overnight in the fridge. Wake up, bake for 4-5 hrs @ 300, enjoy. Turned out pretty damn moist and delicious.

User avatar
Grandpa's Spells
Lifetime IGer
Posts: 10838
Joined: Thu Jan 06, 2005 10:08 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by Grandpa's Spells » Sun Nov 20, 2016 10:28 pm

We used Alton Brown's brine a couple years and it's quite good.
One of the downsides of the Internet is that it allows like-minded people to form communities, and sometimes those communities are stupid.

User avatar
Shafpocalypse Now
Lifetime IGer
Posts: 21109
Joined: Fri Feb 04, 2005 11:26 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by Shafpocalypse Now » Mon Nov 21, 2016 1:40 am

My MIL and own moms cooking is basically atrocious.

bennyonesix
Sgt. Major
Posts: 2710
Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2009 3:25 am

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by bennyonesix » Mon Nov 21, 2016 1:47 am

Bojangles

User avatar
vern
Top
Posts: 2244
Joined: Mon Oct 06, 2008 6:08 am
Location: Down in the cane brake, close by the mill

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by vern » Mon Nov 21, 2016 1:56 am

I'm with bux, deep frying and happy.
“Wherever the crowd goes, run the other direction. They’re always wrong.” Bukowski

User avatar
Holland Oates
Lifetime IGer
Posts: 14137
Joined: Thu Feb 07, 2008 8:32 am
Location: GAWD'S Country
Contact:

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by Holland Oates » Mon Nov 21, 2016 2:11 am

syaigh wrote:Yeah, she's always surprised we dont want to take any with us.
Buddy would eat it.

Best turkey my wife has ever made was done in one of those baking bags. But I prefer fried.
Southern Hospitality Is Aggressive Hospitality

User avatar
Pinky
Sergeant Commanding
Posts: 7100
Joined: Mon Jan 03, 2005 9:09 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by Pinky » Mon Nov 21, 2016 3:52 am

Next to cooking the bird too long, stuffing it is the biggest mistake people make. A stuffed bird will either be overcooked or dangerous.
"The biggest problems that we’re facing right now have to do with George Bush trying to bring more and more power into the executive branch and not go through Congress at all."

DikTracy6000
Sgt. Major
Posts: 2685
Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2005 4:35 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by DikTracy6000 » Mon Nov 21, 2016 1:38 pm

WildGorillaMan wrote:
syaigh wrote:My mom cooks the turkey every year, dry as sawdust.
My idiot mother in law is the kind of old broad who brags about how she "had to" get up at 3am to put the turkey in the oven for a 5pm dinner time.

It's literally inedible unless you drown it in gravy.

Of course nobody tells her she's a shitty cook, instead my idiot in-laws all fawn over it and complement her on it, and perpetuate the cycle of post-mortem animal abuse.
Sounds like a great relationship...lol. Please elaborate.
My wife who's a fair to good cook, has never made a bad turkey, even though she claims to a shitty cook. On that smoked turkey thing, one of my employees years ago, was a turkey-farmer's daughter and she gave me a smoked turkey and a smoked duck from the farm over two different years. It was stupendous. On a side note, when I hired her for her first job out of college, her dad came in to meet me, wearing typical farmer duds, he told me in her presence, if she ever gives me any trouble, just put her over your knee. She turned a deep shade of red. Sorry for my thread hi-jack.

User avatar
nafod
Lifetime IGer
Posts: 11485
Joined: Sat Apr 22, 2006 5:01 pm
Location: Looking in your window

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by nafod » Mon Nov 21, 2016 4:54 pm

I googled the spatchcocking, and now am pressing my wife to give it a go. Sounds like too much sense.
Don’t believe everything you think.

User avatar
WildGorillaMan
Sergeant Commanding
Posts: 9951
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2009 9:01 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by WildGorillaMan » Mon Nov 21, 2016 6:56 pm

nafod wrote:I googled the spatchcocking, and now am pressing my wife to give it a go. Sounds like too much sense.
I do all my roast and grilled chickens that way now too. I was a little nervous about cooking a bigger bird that way but it turned out really well!
Image
You'll Hurt Your Back

basically I'm Raoul Duke trying to fit into a Philip K. Dick movie remake.

bennyonesix
Sgt. Major
Posts: 2710
Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2009 3:25 am

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by bennyonesix » Mon Nov 21, 2016 9:16 pm

Ima do this. 20lber spathchcocked and dry brined for two days. I may do it on oven rack over veggies too.

User avatar
Turdacious
Lifetime IGer
Posts: 20571
Joined: Thu Mar 17, 2005 6:54 am
Location: Upon the eternal throne of the great Republic of Turdistan

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by Turdacious » Tue Nov 22, 2016 4:37 am

Shafpocalypse Now wrote:I agree with syaigh...that butterflied, smoked turkey looks so fucking good I might run out to get a big green egg to smoke one in.
Is there anyone here with a BGE? Maybe one that they got for fathers day?
"Liberalism is arbitrarily selective in its choice of whose dignity to champion." Adrian Vermeule

User avatar
johno
Sergeant Commanding
Posts: 7817
Joined: Mon Mar 07, 2005 6:36 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by johno » Tue Nov 22, 2016 6:20 am

Turdacious wrote: Is there anyone here with a BGE? Maybe one that they got for fathers day?
Turd, you & I have been on IGx from the start. If someone here had a Big Green Egg that they got for Fathers' Day, surely we would have heard about it by now.
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.

W.B. Yeats

User avatar
Pinky
Sergeant Commanding
Posts: 7100
Joined: Mon Jan 03, 2005 9:09 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by Pinky » Tue Nov 22, 2016 9:23 pm

johno wrote:
Turdacious wrote: Is there anyone here with a BGE? Maybe one that they got for fathers day?
Turd, you & I have been on IGx from the start. If someone here had a Big Green Egg that they got for Fathers' Day, surely we would have heard about it by now.
I don't even think it's possible for someone to be so lucky as to receive a Big Green Egg on Fathers' Day.
"The biggest problems that we’re facing right now have to do with George Bush trying to bring more and more power into the executive branch and not go through Congress at all."

User avatar
Turdacious
Lifetime IGer
Posts: 20571
Joined: Thu Mar 17, 2005 6:54 am
Location: Upon the eternal throne of the great Republic of Turdistan

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by Turdacious » Tue Nov 22, 2016 10:15 pm

Pinky wrote:
johno wrote:
Turdacious wrote: Is there anyone here with a BGE? Maybe one that they got for fathers day?
Turd, you & I have been on IGx from the start. If someone here had a Big Green Egg that they got for Fathers' Day, surely we would have heard about it by now.
I don't even think it's possible for someone to be so lucky as to receive a Big Green Egg on Fathers' Day.
Especially someone with ears so big that he could hear you type that (on the off chance such a person exists).
"Liberalism is arbitrarily selective in its choice of whose dignity to champion." Adrian Vermeule

User avatar
Shafpocalypse Now
Lifetime IGer
Posts: 21109
Joined: Fri Feb 04, 2005 11:26 pm

Re: How Do You Cook Your Turkey?

Post by Shafpocalypse Now » Wed Nov 23, 2016 12:59 am

I am fairly certain a person with ears that large, with a BGE, would have popped up in this conversation by now.

Post Reply