Yeah, my experience is that a lot of their "bad" behavior is not meant to be "bad", its just energy/hormones and a lack of self-awareness. You don't have to yell at boys to get them to listen. Maybe to be heard, but that's just loud talking. Realistic, but high expectations with a plan to get there is key. They like understanding the process, it makes them feel more connected to the team and the game.
In my experience, boys like the opportunity to be leaders and they love it when you point out the things they do well or have improved. Boys and girls both like this, ie, don't bullshit them, just be generous with honest observations, ask them what they think about things, and give them opportunities to make good decisions.
I think there is a lot of value to selecting team captains and getting them to run warm-ups and look out for their teammates. It makes the team more cohesive as they develop a sense of togetherness and will make an effort to problem solve with little prompting. They will also push each other a little harder when they feel they have some autonomy.
I have coached a lot of boys who I didn't like at first, but when you give them a challenge and they rise to it, you can start to see the good qualities. I had one boy on my lacrosse team last year who was a total asshole, arrogant little shit. Would yell at his teammates all the time. But, I realized he was yelling at them to be better. He was a little intense, but he was actually a really good leader who set a high bar for the rest of the team and was actually a key part of winning the championship because he knew he needed his team to make it happen and talked them through all the challenges. It was quite amazing to watch.
So, they may drive you nuts. They may be unlikeable. But, get some momentum going, point them in the direction you want them to go, and start encouraging them and see where they go. And if any of them do act like assholes, correct it quickly and move on. There is no worse thing for a teenage boy than to feel humiliated or ousted. IF a kid is a constant problem, send him home, but most of the time, they just need a quick reminder. A lot of times, they aren't aware of what they are doing.
Hope this rambling helps a little.
Never eat more than you can lift.