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Forums › Free Speech › Battling Depression
Thought this was a great thread from the old site.
Dunno what’s going on with the world, but it seems like everyone I know right now — from acquaintances, to friends, to family members — is fighting this. People struggling to keep their house clean, or show up fully at work, or whatever.
My ass is not an exception. I fill my happy cup regularly (surf or workout pretty much daily, have goals, and see people I care about on a daily basis), and still have been dragging hard.
Can’t tell if it’s being worn-the-fuck-out from a year of pandemonium, or something else.
Feel free to compain about things, or brain-storm solutions.
<3
I agree. Lots of people struggling. I get my share of darkness and its really difficult to pull out of. Sometimes its just there, sometimes it is caused by outside influences. I also suffer from anxiety and that can throw me down for days.
I find that focusing on my immediate surroundings helps a lot. My dog, my kids, my family at large. And staying away from alcohol etc. helps a lot as well.
Anyway, I have a lot of thoughts on the topic, but this spring, made my back deck a haven for birds, lizards, etc. Nature was a big part of my childhood. So wa riding horses. I’ve gotten back to both, it helps a lot because I have positive associations with both. I’m trying to get proficient at surfing which is terrifying (because the ocean scares me), but its also very stimulating and good.
I will revisit this thread.
Edited to add: I lost my mother unexpectedly last year. She was a huge part of my life. That carved a deep hole in my world that I’m still trying to crawl out of. I’m trying to help my family through that loss as well so there is a burden associated with that as well.
Spoke to someone yesterday and they phrased not dealing with things as “protecting your energy.”
That’s what it feels like for me. I gotta show up for work and bring a certain level of alertness and care, which drains energy a bit, then extend that to exercise, a healthy diet, and loved ones…then bills, house cleaning, etc. and that energy bucket isn’t as full as I need. So I end up blowing off a lot of shit.
Would like a bigger bucket 🙂
For the most part, everyone’s life was drastically upended in March of 2020. Almost everything we experienced changed dramatically and on every level. From work to home to kids to social. All of it.
That takes a toll on everyone.
And for almost everyone, getting back to normal is just as sudden and just as drastic. And not a lot of jobs are touchy feely and supportive. You’ve been home for 6 months? Fuck you get back to work and put on your mask. No comfortable? Fuck you deal with it. Oh, your kid coughed twice at school and now has to be home for two weeks? Deal with it.
At my work everyone was back and putting on masks and teaching kids in class and at home and it didn’t really matter how you were feeling about it. It’s the job. And for most of the year there was a very passive aggressive “voluntary” covid screening program where people were expected, after work, to go get their brains swabbed out through the nasal cavity. And a 100 other changes that happened on an almost weekly basis. Every single updated protocol by the health department brought a whole new program that everyone had to deal with.
I’ve got friends who had to go back to work. Friends who want to go back to work but their company sold the building. Laid off. Grandparents died and couldn’t have a funeral. Haven’t seen their significant other in almost a year because of travel restrictions. And on and on and on.
The amount of bullshit people have been through this year is a lot. And no matter where you fall on the political spectrum, the stuff that happened last summer and through the election is just one more added trauma.
What this country (maybe world) needs is a one year ban on social media, one year of three day weekends, and mandatory outdoor recreation activity once a week.
Sangoma,
I’ll watch your link, but in the meantime, this was a summary I found in the comments:
“Everything he’s said here…is mapped to Self-Determination Theory. All human beings have 3 universal needs: Autonomy – ownership of your life and choices; Competence – the ability, wisdom and skill to do something extremely well; Interconnection – mutually beneficial, healthy relationships.”
Just got back from a week with family, and the first normal vacation in 1.5 years. Feeling super good from it, more notable due to the past few months being a struggle.
Guesses on what made the difference:
Now back in San Diego, there will be challenges as vacation isn’t reality, but planning to prioritize the above three and see what happens.
Hope everyone’s doing okay 🙂
An update on my cousin. He’s a wonderful person, but has been battling depression for years. He was an avid rock climber and yoga practitioner, but he quit both about a year ago, hasn’t been working, and we (his family) couldn’t get him to see a therapist or psychiatrist.
After numerous failed attempts, over a period of years, trying to persuade him to change, I started calling him, sometimes daily, and asking what’s up…how’s it going? And so on.
We spent a week in June, where I gave him a little workout routine, we did a yoga class, a hike, played chess, and climbed together.
He’s kept the workouts ups, then recently met a girl, hung out a few times…and now he has his first girlfriend! And his confidence and self-esteem are so improved, the best I’ve ever seen. It’s awesome seeing him flourish as a person! He’s looking for work, exercising often, finally helping his parents around the house, and so on.
I spent a few years trying to tell him what to do…and a little bit of time just being his friend. Being a friend was much more valuable.
An update on my cousin. He’s a wonderful person, but has been battling depression for years. He was an avid rock climber and yoga practitioner, but he quit both about a year ago, hasn’t been working, and we (his family) couldn’t get him to see a therapist or psychiatrist.
After numerous failed attempts, over a period of years, trying to persuade him to change, I started calling him, sometimes daily, and asking what’s up…how’s it going? And so on.
We spent a week in June, where I gave him a little workout routine, we did a yoga class, a hike, played chess, and climbed together.
He’s kept the workouts ups, then recently met a girl, hung out a few times…and now he has his first girlfriend! And his confidence and self-esteem are so improved, the best I’ve ever seen. It’s awesome seeing him flourish as a person! He’s looking for work, exercising often, finally helping his parents around the house, and so on.
I spent a few years trying to tell him what to do…and a little bit of time just being his friend. Being a friend was much more valuable.
That’s great news, Bram!!!
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