The couch thread

[Gin Master]

Honestly, up to this point, my exposure to Crossfit...

Get ready to ram your Viking helmet through the wall. Even a smarty-art muscle gnome like you cannot prepared for the mental onslaught of narcissism and faggotry that is @F.

[Mickey O'neil]

A gem from @fit Mississauga:

At @F it takes two people to be as weak as one beginner on any other program.

This is beyond retarded.

[ChAoSnPAIN]

You'd think Sears would have some material ready to go since he wrote several books about it. I guess he's been sequestered in the inner chamber for some auditing.

I did notice something interesting when it came to comparing Sears and Cordain.

Stop by a used book store or a thrift store's donated book area.

Try to find "The Paleo Diet" book and chances are you'll come up with nothing.

Look for anything from Sears and you'll find about 5-10 books (some in the original packaging).

On a nearly wholly unrelated note- Cordain's academic stuff is great, but the Paleo Diet is total horseshit, and contradicts his academic work in spots (to be more accessible?). Neanderthin is a far better book on Paleo dieting. Interestingly, the first person I could find who advocated a paleo diet wasn't weston price- it was Buckminster Fuller, the creator of the geodesic dome.

[Yes I Have Balls]

Honestly, up to this point, my exposure to Crossfit...

Get ready to ram your Viking helmet through the wall. Even a smarty-art muscle gnome like you cannot prepared for the mental onslaught of narcissism and faggotry that is @F.

Dunno. The gnome has faggot narcissism down pretty good.

[ChAoSnPAIN]

Honestly, up to this point, my exposure to Crossfit...

Get ready to ram your Viking helmet through the wall. Even a smarty-art muscle gnome like you cannot prepared for the mental onslaught of narcissism and faggotry that is @F.

^ I actually laughed out loud at this.

[Dunn]

A gem from @fit Mississauga:

I love the fact that the woman got the weight up before the fag. Haha.

[lasalle]

Re: Getting my Mum into CF
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Easton View Post
Hey all,

So I am home for the christmas holidays and, after being asked what I was doing during a WOD, have explained everything CF to my parents. Both of them are 51 and are pretty out of shape. The other day my mum asked me to create a sort of sample workout/workouts for her. She is about 5"5' and weighs around 180lbs. The only problem she has is stress induced swelling in her ankle. So what I was hoping for was any ideas of what I should get her to do? Any info would be extremely helpful.

Tim Huthert
Cheers
The wad is infinitely scalable. Her needs vary by degree not in kind. Fire her into a scaled WAD and wait for uncle pukie.

Fess up, fuckers. Which one of you is this? A- for the trolling and posting over there today, but a weak C- for content.

[Mountebank]

For those of you who would like to read the trouncing of Assman by Coach Sommer, I give you this thread...
http://board.crossfit.com/showthread.php?t=10982
Sommer (very Caviston-like in his restraint) proceeds to destroy couch on so many levels...yet another noodle lo mein that couch gets schooled on...gym-Nastics!

Let us remind couch and the lurkers of just what Sommer has done, in comparison to couch's unproven gym-Nastic career:

Christopher Sommer is a professional gymnastics instructor with over 25 years experience and has coached numerous State, Regional and National Champions.

EDIT: One last thing, for those of you who like ex-softball players with glutes & hams, here's her doing some GPP at Catalyst...http://cathletics.com/wod/video/jocelyn ... -16-09.mov. Enjoy.

[WildGorillaMan]

Re: Getting my Mum into CF
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Easton View Post
Hey all,

So I am home for the christmas holidays and, after being asked what I was doing during a WOD, have explained everything CF to my parents. Both of them are 51 and are pretty out of shape. The other day my mum asked me to create a sort of sample workout/workouts for her. She is about 5"5' and weighs around 180lbs. The only problem she has is stress induced swelling in her ankle. So what I was hoping for was any ideas of what I should get her to do? Any info would be extremely helpful.

Tim Huthert
Cheers
The wad is infinitely scalable. Her needs vary by degree not in kind. Fire her into a scaled WAD and wait for uncle pukie.

Fess up, fuckers. Which one of you is this? A- for the trolling and posting over there today, but a weak C- for content.

Oh come on, that was pretty good.

[Anon]

For those of you who would like to read the trouncing of Assman by Coach Sommer, I give you this thread...
http://board.crossfit.com/showthread.php?t=10982
Sommer (very Caviston-like in his restraint) proceeds to destroy couch on so many levels...yet another noodle lo mein that couch gets schooled on...gym-Nastics!

Let us remind couch and the lurkers of just what Sommer has done, in comparison to couch's unproven gym-Nastic career:

Christopher Sommer is a professional gymnastics instructor with over 25 years experience and has coached numerous State, Regional and National Champions.

EDIT: One last thing, for those of you who like ex-softball players with glutes & hams, here's her doing some GPP at Catalyst...http://cathletics.com/wod/video/jocelyn ... -16-09.mov. Enjoy.

How long before those old posts get deleted? Frankly I am surprised they are not redacted.

Perhaps Coach Sommer has someone more powerful than this? I susect the answer is an ineluctable no (lol who uses ineluctable ... what a douche).

http://media.crossfit.com/cf-video/Cros ... terfly.wmv

[lasalle]

Re: Getting my Mum into CF
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Easton View Post
Hey all,

So I am home for the christmas holidays and, after being asked what I was doing during a WOD, have explained everything CF to my parents. Both of them are 51 and are pretty out of shape. The other day my mum asked me to create a sort of sample workout/workouts for her. She is about 5"5' and weighs around 180lbs. The only problem she has is stress induced swelling in her ankle. So what I was hoping for was any ideas of what I should get her to do? Any info would be extremely helpful.

Tim Huthert
Cheers
The wad is infinitely scalable. Her needs vary by degree not in kind. Fire her into a scaled WAD and wait for uncle pukie.

Fess up, fuckers. Which one of you is this? A- for the trolling and posting over there today, but a weak C- for content.

Oh come on, that was pretty good.

Well, it's a slow news day, so I confess it's growing on me.

[CultBuster]

Training only with perfect form will keep an athlete from ever outputting at maximum wattage.

It cracks me up that Couch has the temerity to call bullshit on Coach Sommer. Couch has "produced" some ok athletes using @fit standards and a few guys who actually matter in the real worl (Greg and Josh being about it) If either of them trained using any other program they would still be badd ass, and they would actually accomplish something. I don't know how anyone with any dignity can subject themselves to being critiques by all those assholes at home. Sommer hands couch his ass again and again.

zone.jpg (33.58 KiB) Viewed 8686 times

Dude even has CF tats LOL!

The Zone Diet--Forging Elite Disorders Worlwide!

[Yes I Have Balls]

Coach, what surprises me the most is not the fact that you made a mistake, but that you appear to be unwilling to admit it and move forward. You have tried to cloud the issue by turning an observation of incorrect technique into a debate of the worthiness of the CrossFit method.

This was in 2005. It is now 2010. Ask Everett and Wolf and Rippetoe about couch's (and asstro's) inability to admit a mistake and move on.

[ab g-d]

Matt Gag-li-ardi was an alright guy at one point.

What happened to him? Wasn't he lying about workouts or something?

Exactly. Dude got called out on his times as being near impossible and for always having some lame excuse for not going to a cert. . .for free. Couch played cockgobbler to him, begging him to come to cert. Matt was always "on the road" and doing his WAD's in hotel gyms. His undoing was his claim of sub :45 400m times. IIRC, he claimed an average :41 on 4 400's. In other words a sub 4 min mile.

He claimed he was tired of all the "shit talking" on rest days. I know of some who maintain contact with him.
I'm sure he lurks here.

Gagliardi was the one who posted where I worked online since he thought making of fun of CF disqualified me from holding a position of trust.

[ab g-d]

Matt Gag-li-ardi was an alright guy at one point.

What happened to him? Wasn't he lying about workouts or something?

Exactly. Dude got called out on his times as being near impossible and for always having some lame excuse for not going to a cert. . .for free. Couch played cockgobbler to him, begging him to come to cert. Matt was always "on the road" and doing his WAD's in hotel gyms. His undoing was his claim of sub :45 400m times. IIRC, he claimed an average :41 on 4 400's. In other words a sub 4 min mile.

He claimed he was tired of all the "shit talking" on rest days. I know of some who maintain contact with him.
I'm sure he lurks here.

Gagliardi was the one who posted where I worked online since he thought making of fun of CF disqualified me from holding a position of trust.

[Crust Bucket]

No kid has ever or will ever work at the output that Mr. Amundson and the other CrossFit elite do. Not ever. Not anywhere.

Buwhahahahaha....Fuck you ya fat fucking gin drinking ass licker.

[Sofa King]

Matt Gag-li-ardi was an alright guy at one point.

What happened to him? Wasn't he lying about workouts or something?

Exactly. Dude got called out on his times as being near impossible and for always having some lame excuse for not going to a cert. . .for free. Couch played cockgobbler to him, begging him to come to cert. Matt was always "on the road" and doing his WAD's in hotel gyms. His undoing was his claim of sub :45 400m times. IIRC, he claimed an average :41 on 4 400's. In other words a sub 4 min mile.

He claimed he was tired of all the "shit talking" on rest days. I know of some who maintain contact with him.
I'm sure he lurks here.

Gagliardi was the one who posted where I worked online since he thought making of fun of CF disqualified me from holding a position of trust.

That's about the time I got off the "Matt G. is a g-d and a machine" bandwagon. Thanks for reminding me of why, O Foxy one.

[Shafpocalypse Now]

Gagliardi was a supreme dipshit and liar and overall a low class closeted semen drinker.

[Holland Oates]

I can remember when Matt got called out for his supposed WOD times.

Good times.

Ah the memories.

[Sofa King]

For those of you who would like to read the trouncing of Assman by Coach Sommer, I give you this thread...
http://board.crossfit.com/showthread.php?t=10982
Sommer (very Caviston-like in his restraint) proceeds to destroy couch on so many levels...yet another noodle lo mein that couch gets schooled on...gym-Nastics!

Let us remind couch and the lurkers of just what Sommer has done, in comparison to couch's unproven gym-Nastic career:

Christopher Sommer is a professional gymnastics instructor with over 25 years experience and has coached numerous State, Regional and National Champions.

EDIT: One last thing, for those of you who like ex-softball players with glutes & hams, here's her doing some GPP at Catalyst...http://cathletics.com/wod/video/jocelyn ... -16-09.mov. Enjoy.

1. Half of that chick is very impressive. The other half, not so much.
2. Black Flag with Keith Morris singing was better than most of the work with Rollins as lead.
3. Coach Sommer's pwnage of the couch was impressive. Tyler Hass came off as a sycophantic douche in trying to play middleman.

[Sofa King]

Gagliardi was a supreme dipshit and liar and overall a low class closeted semen drinker.

Don't hold back, Shafman. Let it flow.
What was his beef with you? I seem to remember it as being very entertaining.

[lasalle]

2. Black Flag with Keith Morris singing was better than most of the work with Rollins as lead.

Indisputable. edit: This is a truth derived through competition, not debate.

[theoverman]

For those of you who would like to read the trouncing of Assman by Coach Sommer, I give you this thread...
http://board.crossfit.com/showthread.php?t=10982
Sommer (very Caviston-like in his restraint) proceeds to destroy couch on so many levels...yet another noodle lo mein that couch gets schooled on...gym-Nastics!

Lot of rage fuel in that thread.

EDIT: One last thing, for those of you who like ex-softball players with glutes & hams, here's her doing some GPP at Catalyst...http://cathletics.com/wod/video/jocelyn ... -16-09.mov. Enjoy.

That is confusingly erotic.

[dead man walking]

Ah shit Sofa King you are right.

The Parkour thing just kind of disappeared like the gymnastics thing.

bring back buddy lee

[Anon]

lol @ Token Lee