The couch thread

POD · Post by **POD** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 2:48 am

Hah, the SicFit cuntbags are filtering comments on their "Jesus WOD" post now. So they know it's insulting people, but they refuse to take it down.

http://www.sicfit.com/video/main/show/i ... 4-Stations

This guy even tried to justify it as their way of glorifying God.

Reality says:
April 13, 2010
People honor their heroes in their own way. To some, Jesus is a pretty important hero. This WOD, from what I've seen is about more than CrossFit. When you go to church, you drink wine and eat bread to be like his apostles. Since when has it been blasphemous to try to be like him, in all of your actions? That is exactly what the bible tells us to do. The bible says, honor him with ALL of your deeds. There are a lot of people in the CrossFit community who believe that their strength is from God, not themselves.

I did the WOD, it broke me. I don't think that it can be done as prescribed. I didn't see anyone on this video hold the bar for the entire time. That illustrated to me that the pain that he experienced was so much greater than anything that we can bear. That was my experience when I tried this WOD, so get off of the person's back who posted this vid.

Because God clearly put us on this earth just so we can work out 'till we barf (while shirtless of course), then post videos online to show how elite we are at it. That's exactly why we're here.

Hank Scorpio · Post by **Hank Scorpio** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 1:25 pm

I again official declare this thread is dead.

syiagh or whatever recently summed up by restating a post I made in 2006: @fit is nothing more than unstructured anaerobic or HIIT intervals combined with a poorly designed and executed or even nonexistent strength training. It is a stupid and cultish subculture. That's it, end of discussion.

Now that we've come full circle after 4 years, it is time to move on. This thread is a powerful addiction for recovering @fitters, but you all need to let it go. Post a training log or something constructive. If you must post andro chicks put them in the FSF under WGM's new thread dedicated to vile sluts you might want to pec-fuck, if you like women with tree swinging traps.

That is all.

T200 · Post by **T200** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 1:32 pm

POD wrote: Because God clearly put us on this earth just so we can work out 'till we barf (while shirtless of course), then post videos online to show how elite we are at it. That's exactly why we're here.

POD, please enlighten me why we are here. Thanks!

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 1:39 pm

Tequila is so Paleo, but what's up with Witch Hazel there on the right?

No baby, leave the bands on:

@fit and bondage: do daddy issues play into this?
http://gopractice.typepad.com/.a/6a0105 ... 010970b-pi

http://gopractice.typepad.com/.a/6a0105 ... b4d970c-pi

http://gopractice.typepad.com/.a/6a0105 ... 2d3970b-pi

http://gopractice.typepad.com/.a/6a0105 ... 251970c-pi

grip junky · Post by **grip junky** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 1:43 pm

The thread is not dead just sleeping, or should be. When the time is right it will wake up.

Hank Scorpio · Post by **Hank Scorpio** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 1:44 pm

This thread is dogshit.

TerryB · Post by **TerryB** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 1:56 pm

POD wrote:Here's the Facebook page of the chick who posted the above blog about wanting to skip her brother's wedding.

http://www.facebook.com/search/?src=os& ... lla?ref=ts

So, who wants to friend her, find her brother on her friends list, then send him a link to that blog post?

How about you, dipshit, since you took the time to find that and had the idea? You coulda just DONE it, then got a good response, and THEN posted the awesomeness. THAT would've been a good post.

Shapecharge · Post by **Shapecharge** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 2:02 pm

Let he who begat this monster now slay it and put it to rest. Bill declare this thing dead.

powerlifter54 · Post by **powerlifter54** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 2:04 pm

Shapecharge wrote:Let he who begat this monster now slay it and put it to rest. Bill declare this thing dead.

No no no. I promise that by mid july the nest will be swarming.

Mountebank · Post by **Mountebank** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 2:22 pm

powerlifter54 wrote:
Shapecharge wrote:Let he who begat this monster now slay it and put it to rest. Bill declare this thing dead.
No no no. I promise that by mid july the nest will be swarming.

Right, just yin and yang here. Calm before the storm.

The Real Rant · Post by **The Real Rant** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 2:23 pm

I may start a thread on why this thread sucks.

Stillwater · Post by **Stillwater** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 2:24 pm

Here's a little hate tank top off for you.

And if you whiny little bitches don't like it GTFO.

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 2:26 pm

@fit Kids' new t-shirt: "Child Abuse, Building Character The Old-Fashioned Way"

Gin Master · Post by **Gin Master** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 3:10 pm

powerlifter54 wrote:
Shapecharge wrote:Let he who begat this monster now slay it and put it to rest. Bill declare this thing dead.
No no no. I promise that by mid july the nest will be swarming.

Indeed. The conflict has changed, and our enemy has evolved. You short attention span guys need to realize that, while Couch is in hiding, we won't have gold every day. But be patient. Let the game come to you.

What's on the horizon?

* The 2010 Gaymes. Who will win? Who will get screwed by the setup? How many samples will be lost? How much Progenex will be pushed? Who will be the next fittest man and woman on the planet?

* Standardization. Couch is trying to get an ANSI standard on fitness. This will produce gold.

* Couch's divorce. Couch is too proud to sign a decree and give Lauren half. There will be a trial, there will be public records, and there damn sure better be an IGX reporter in that courtroom when Lauren's attorney rapes Couch with a rusty pitchfork (not a virtual pitchfork, either).

* Affiliate Armageddon. Couch and HQ have warned affiliates that dare to host outside seminars at their boxxx. You won't see Rip, Everett, Wolff, or any other presenter at a @F establishment (unless they have a foot out the door, too. Also, don't expect the co-branding issue to die quietly.

* The affiliate vs. franchise issue. It is not yet ripe but soon will be.

There is so much to be hopeful for. Be patient. Let the Couch thread drop every once in awhile. But good times are ahead.

Stillwater · Post by **Stillwater** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 3:25 pm

Looks like Mr. Martone is doing his own "TACTICAL ATHLETE® INSTRUCTOR CERTIFICATION" now.

http://tacticalathlete.com/seminars.php

How long till HQ gets their panties twisted and sends him packing?

Mountebank · Post by **Mountebank** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 3:32 pm

I heard the other day from an affiliate that another affiliate has been given the axe (after Catalyst, NorCal, and Whole9), but the name escaped them. Anyone know who this one is?

I believe many affiliates now have a real fear of @FHQ axe. If they don't, they probably should.

sanchezero · Post by **sanchezero** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 3:35 pm

thanks, monkey man. i appreciate all the effort you put into finding these 'ladies.'

fuck the haters.

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 3:37 pm

Quack Attack wrote:
I believe many affiliates now have a real fear of @FHQ axe. If they don't, they probably should.

Which is funny, because they really have nothing to fear. They could go on calling themselves "@fit [location name or hardcore-sounding adjective]" without paying $2K a year, and there's not a goddamn thing HQ can do about it besides slander them on the internet.

HQ doesn't have control over their trademark, they have the appearance of control, and one day soon that will slip.

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 3:37 pm

sanchezero wrote:thanks, monkey man. i appreciate all the effort you put into finding these 'ladies.'

fuck the haters.

De nada, sir.

Yes I Have Balls · Post by **Yes I Have Balls** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 3:54 pm

Holland Oates · Post by **Holland Oates** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 4:00 pm

ARGH

Do not want!

Do not want!

Do not want!

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 4:02 pm

That's quite the scoliosis or lordosis or whatever she's got going on there, YHIB.

Are there any new pics from your tanklike avatar girl?

CultBuster · Post by **CultBuster** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 4:28 pm

http://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/...8249722?ref=ts

begging to be mocked!

I see some good shit on the horizon with the new written L1 test

Lisbeth...

1. Really? An Affiliate owner asks you questions and you blast back in such a manner. I asked for direction from you, nothing personal. Whatever you read into my post was clearly read through an emotion that was not intended

Anyhow, CrossFit is adding requirements. This is one. Everyone who wants to attain or maintain affiliation will have to meet it. As for future requirements and higher levels of testing, we're looking at things all the time, as any forward-minded company would. You are always free to submit your ideas and thoughts to [email protected] and we'll pass them onto the right folks.

Thanks for your support of CrossFit, Eric!

Comment #15 - Posted by: Lisbeth at April 15, 2010 7:51 AM

Hi

I am a little confused about the April cut off date. I got Level One certified in January and took the test and received a passing score. At the Certification they told us that this requirement was coming and that if we passed it would count for the five year period has this changed, do I need to get re-certified this year?

Becky Newell

Comment #18 - Posted by: Becky N at April 15, 2010 8:49 AM

So--before you could get a level1 and use the name CrossFit, but not open and affilate and state that you were doing CF workouts to your clients. no way to do shit about it because of franchise rules. NOW you need to take a written test every few years to keep current. They are going to start going after the guys who took level 1 in 2001 and never paid couch another cent. Johnny G did this with Spinning and it was the death of his program. They ran him out after that. People (even these douches) can only be pushed so far!

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 4:52 pm

I really hope they don't kill the Golden Goose.

And I've got a late submission for consideration for the Douchey the Clown mascot:

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Fri Apr 16, 2010 4:54 pm

And a bonus Andro Friday entry, with some thick stems.

IGX

The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread

Re: The couch thread