The couch thread

Hymen Asshole · Post by **Hymen Asshole** » Mon Aug 15, 2011 8:05 pm

Gangbang WOD:
20 guys for time,
extra calories for spit roasted paleo loads

Fat Cat · Post by **Fat Cat** » Mon Aug 15, 2011 8:20 pm

rjudo · Post by **rjudo** » Mon Aug 15, 2011 9:14 pm

Cave Canem wrote:
I have come to realize that there is no bottom here. Every time I think that we have reached the ultimate depth of this "community's" collective stupidity, some chucklehead digs the hole a little deeper. And then gets lauded for it.

Exactly. The hate fades now and again, but there is always another retard to bring it back to life.

Cave Canem · Post by **Cave Canem** » Mon Aug 15, 2011 10:13 pm

rjudo wrote:
Cave Canem wrote:
I have come to realize that there is no bottom here. Every time I think that we have reached the ultimate depth of this "community's" collective stupidity, some chucklehead digs the hole a little deeper. And then gets lauded for it.

Exactly. The hate fades now and again, but there is always another retard to bring it back to life.

Saw this on the parallel tread that is going on over at CA. The asshats are not only digging the hole deeper, they seem to be using power tools;

http://www.theprisonyardgames.com/

Not only are they as fit and eleet as Navy Seal pups but now they're gonna be as bad as prison inmates. Some times life truly is stranger than fiction. What's the point? How much more stupid can these people actually get ? Is it fun to play inmate? Put these motherfuckers in the can for day and they'd turn bitch in a heartbeat.
Who comes up with this shit ? "Hey, Bony, I just watched a show on Discovery channel about Pelican Bay. Those guys are so badass." "Really. Fidel ? Let's make a WOD about it. Even better let's have fucking GAMES !! Then we'll be badass, too !" Prison and WOD - two words most men DON'T want to hear in the same sentence.
Maybe they're just practicing for when OHS Daddy drops the bar on his munchkin and gets locked up for child abuse. Holy jumping monkeymotherfucking gorilla jeebus, these fucks make my head hurt.

kreator · Post by **kreator** » Mon Aug 15, 2011 11:15 pm

http://www.theprisonyardgames.com/FAQs.html

2. Will the event actually take place inside a Prison?

No.

4. Will food be provided?

No.

10. How much does it cost?

The entrance fee is $83 per athlete (plus processing fees) for our early bird special through August 31st. Starting September 1st, the entrance fee increases to $98 (plus processing fees). Registration closes on September 18th or when we sell out of spots. The entrance fee includes an event T-.shirt).

Jeebus. You pay over 83 bucks (100+ if you're late) to do some pushups in a park somewhere? And you don't get food? And you don't even get to visit a prison?? WTF??

For that much money I could enter two Oly meets (an actual sport that is recognized by an international body).

Better yet, I could go buy a rack of lamb and a bottle of bourbon, then invite some friends out to a parking lot, and do burpees for FREE!!!!

Holland Oates · Post by **Holland Oates** » Mon Aug 15, 2011 11:44 pm

kreator wrote: Better yet, I could go buy a rack of lamb and a bottle of bourbon, then invite some friends out to a parking lot, and do burpees for FREE!!!!

Sign me up. But let's drop the burpees.

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Mon Aug 15, 2011 11:48 pm

WildGorillaBender wrote:I don't need you, I don't need anybody! I'm going to put on my own @fit Games! Only with Blackjack! And hookers!

In fact, forget the @fit Games!

rjudo · Post by **rjudo** » Mon Aug 15, 2011 11:52 pm

Hey Kreator. Nice job on the white paper, first time I've seen it.

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Mon Aug 15, 2011 11:55 pm

I'm in for Kreator's Lambfest (Lambarama? Lambpocalypse?). PM me the deets.

In other news: PRO TIP: If even other @fitters are pointing and laughing you may want to revisit your programming.

http://www.crossfitvirtuosity.com/today ... 011-08-15/

DrDonkeyLove · Post by **DrDonkeyLove** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 12:50 am

WildGorillaMan wrote:I'm in for Kreator's Lambfest (Lambarama? Lambpocalypse?). PM me the deets.

In other news: PRO TIP: If even other @fitters are pointing and laughing you may want to revisit your programming.

http://www.crossfitvirtuosity.com/today ... 011-08-15/

Looks like a badass modal domain. Did that come from the SEAL's or Folsom prison?

Crust Bucket · Post by **Crust Bucket** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 12:53 am

Oh WTF!?

sanitized reality · Post by **sanitized reality** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 12:57 am

Jason Khalipa describes his gym's idea of a "man test" here.

Note that the softball throw is not part of said test.

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 1:12 am

I don't understand how it's possible to make it out of elementary school without learning to throw a ball. Kids that threw like a retard scared by a bee were eaten alive in the schoolyard jungle. You had to learn fast, or go home in tears.

Next year at the games they could cut the field by 3/4 just by making them have to spiral a football for both distance and accuracy.

Jay · Post by **Jay** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 1:57 am

SyphFit wrote:Jason Khalipa describes his gym's idea of a "man test" here.

Note that the softball throw is not part of said test.

We used to do this shit back in grade school.

There is a new man test from what I hear, its called shit like bench press, squat and deadlift. Its revolutionary and shows strength and muscle maturity. There's another man test as well, its called not fucking doing @fit.

Jesus christ they are fucking lame.

I won't comment on that pic from Virtuosity because for as much as Keith is involved with @fit he is also a solid dude and is a good instructor. I've been to his place a few times in my koolaid days and he is one of the better ones around.

rjudo · Post by **rjudo** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 2:21 am

Jeezusfuckinhchrist! Kipping dips. Faggottry.

Spider Monkey · Post by **Spider Monkey** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 3:00 am

Jay wrote: I won't comment on that pic from Virtuosity because for as much as Keith is involved with @fit he is also a solid dude and is a good instructor. I've been to his place a few times in my koolaid days and he is one of the better ones around.

Keith is good people, and has a sense of humor.

Grandpa's Spells · Post by **Grandpa's Spells** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 3:04 am

WildGorillaMan wrote:I'm in for Kreator's Lambfest (Lambarama? Lambpocalypse?). PM me the deets.

In other news: PRO TIP: If even other @fitters are pointing and laughing you may want to revisit your programming.

http://www.crossfitvirtuosity.com/today ... 011-08-15/

Holy fuck, what a Requiem for a Dream moment.

TerryB · Post by **TerryB** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 3:50 am

I just want to know if the girls on the right side have a double headed dildo in their gym bag. The band adds another layer of excitement!

PeterNorth · Post by **PeterNorth** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 9:42 am

How to Zercher squat, CF style (vibrams and Korn required)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g4X3mIJkoLo

Then he gets fired up for rep 2, the music helps more this time:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gxkfLU1sVx4&NR=1

Beer Jew · Post by **Beer Jew** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 9:50 am

PeterNorth wrote:How to Zercher squat, CF style (vibrams and Korn required)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g4X3mIJkoLo

Then he gets fired up for rep 2, the music helps more this time:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gxkfLU1sVx4&NR=1

If thats the failed lift, welcome to 2 years ago, faggot.

Freki · Post by **Freki** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 12:04 pm

Grandpa's Spells wrote:
WildGorillaMan wrote:I'm in for Kreator's Lambfest (Lambarama? Lambpocalypse?). PM me the deets.

In other news: PRO TIP: If even other @fitters are pointing and laughing you may want to revisit your programming.

http://www.crossfitvirtuosity.com/today ... 011-08-15/

Holy fuck, what a Requiem for a Dream moment.

Wait a minute, in order to get into that position originally, given the bands aren't all that big when they aren't stretched, wouldn't they have to have been basically ass to ass?

TerryB · Post by **TerryB** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 12:42 pm

Oh look! They colored their floor with sidwalk chalk! Is the hopscotch box just outside the frame?

The Crawdaddy · Post by **The Crawdaddy** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 12:45 pm

protobuilder wrote:Oh look! They colored their floor with sidwalk chalk! Is the hopscotch box just outside the frame?

Careful. Ass-tro and Pudding will be collecting ideas for the next Gaymes!

Turdacious · Post by **Turdacious** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 2:59 pm

The Crawdaddy wrote:
protobuilder wrote:Oh look! They colored their floor with sidwalk chalk! Is the hopscotch box just outside the frame?
Careful. Ass-tro and Pudding will be collecting ideas for the next Gaymes!

Doubt it, may be hard for the @fit elite to get a DNF on this one.

The Crawdaddy · Post by **The Crawdaddy** » Tue Aug 16, 2011 3:19 pm

You are severely overestimating their eleeettttness. If you can DNF a softball throw, you could fuck up hopscotch. Guaran-damn-teed.

IGX

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