The couch thread

[The Ginger Beard Man]

Well, the blocky girl thing is kind of a stereotype. Pitchers, and first basemen tend to fit that bill. Catchers tend toward stocky, but it's hard to be fat when you're up and down so much. Outfield, short, and third they get pretty lithe or they won't survive. My girls tend toward more athletic build, and they seem to like guys so there's no hope for them beyond high school.

If it were me it would be a lot of glute ham work, push/pull the sled, med ball throws/slams, and some general strength upper body work. In and out the door in 45 minutes, three days a week, never overdo it on any one thing, with an eye toward individual needs...try to get the weak ones stronger, and try to get the strong ones faster.

Is it just me, or has anybody else noticed that female softballers tend toward Sapphism once they're playing at the collegiate level? Back me up, here...

It's a magnet for lesbians. I don't know why.

I work with a guy who swears his twin cousins earned scholarships to a big softball school but ended up quitting after their freshman year because they were under so much pressure from teammates to start choosing down on muff.

[Kenny X]

Well, the blocky girl thing is kind of a stereotype. Pitchers, and first basemen tend to fit that bill. Catchers tend toward stocky, but it's hard to be fat when you're up and down so much. Outfield, short, and third they get pretty lithe or they won't survive. My girls tend toward more athletic build, and they seem to like guys so there's no hope for them beyond high school.

If it were me it would be a lot of glute ham work, push/pull the sled, med ball throws/slams, and some general strength upper body work. In and out the door in 45 minutes, three days a week, never overdo it on any one thing, with an eye toward individual needs...try to get the weak ones stronger, and try to get the strong ones faster.

Is it just me, or has anybody else noticed that female softballers tend toward Sapphism once they're playing at the collegiate level? Back me up, here...

It's a magnet for lesbians. I don't know why.

I work with a guy who swears his twin cousins earned scholarships to a big softball school but ended up quitting after their freshman year because they were under so much pressure from teammates to start choosing down on muff.

PFFFT! Yeah, and us men are the assholes because we're the ones pressuring young ladies into having sex!

[TerryB]

Her triceps hurts the first week of a new training system.

That's not surprising, nor necessarily a harbinger of evil to come.

I don't know, but I'm guessing kids all over the country get stuck in shitty HS S&C programs; yet, many survive and get much stronger and/or fitter. Is it the best, Olympic level training they need to reach their absolute potential in a specific sport? No, but it probably doesn't have to be.

It sounds like you're in the same position as pretty much anyone who knows about S&C and has a kid with a stupid coach (read: most of them, even at the highest levels of sport...aren't some football programs still using circuits and machines?).

Go above his head, and tell the administration you'll sue if they farm the training out to an idiot with a weekend certification.

but then you've got to deal with the practical politics of wanting your kid to thrive on the team, etc.

[Kazuya Mishima]

Update:

Yesterday it was squats with 70% of the 1RM they took last week BECAUSE NOVICE GIRLS WHO STARTED LIFTING LAST WEEK NEED PERCENTAGE BASED PROGRAMS IN ORDER TO TRIGGER TEH GAINZ AND PROGRESSHUNZ.

Then it was main page retardation style training...15 burpees and 15 wall balls in two minutes, repeated for 10 cycles BECAUSE YOU PAID ME TO SMOKE THESE GURLZ AND MAKE THEM HARD 2 KILL.

You can't make this shit up...

[Kazuya Mishima]

Her triceps hurts the first week of a new training system.

Or, it could be that even advanced athletes could hurt themselves doing brain dead movements like barbell thrusters...which they did.

[Kazuya Mishima]

That is absolutely fucking retarded and horrible, Kaz. I wish this were not the norm, but...

As a gym owner who works with teams in and off-season, this sort of shit is what most of the parents I deal with believe their kids need. It is fucking awful. They want your place to be combo afterschool babysitting service, bootcamp, and magical agility drill service. Even the parents that sort of get it also sort of don't understand that their kid probably does not need to be in the gym if he or she is playing a sport ten hours a week and having trouble finishing their homework. It's fucking frustrating...we have our kids strength train (mostly bodyweight for that age in a larger group setting) and do either prowler, sprints, jog or bike and all we hear from the fucking parents are that the kids aren't working hard enough because they are not at VO2 max every second of the hour. (And the hour itself is something I am pissed off at myself for acquiescing to...most of the kids have 30, MAYBE 40 minutes attention span at the end of a school day.)

All that said...sucks. Hopefully the trainer develops frozen shoulder from jacking it to too many Rich Froning videos and you get someone more competent in there.

I appreciate the sympathy, and I'm sure that I'm preaching to the choir when I say most parents want "their money's worth" so if the kid isn't getting smoked and working MOAR HARDER THAN JIMMY ACROSS THE STREET then you might as well be robbing them in their eyes. It's stupid and this is how Crossfit chowder heads get a free pass because most people's knowledge of sports training is what they've gleaned from Rocky training montages...chase chickens, run through snow, climb mountains, 1,000 one arm pushups, veins sticking out on neck, face purple, every stitch drenched in sweat, and the synth rock pounding in the background like a motherfucker. High fives, bro slaps, and now let's go kill the competition because we're TOUGH.

[TerryB]

Update:

Yesterday it was squats with 70% of the 1RM they took last week BECAUSE NOVICE GIRLS WHO STARTED LIFTING LAST WEEK NEED PERCENTAGE BASED PROGRAMS IN ORDER TO TRIGGER TEH GAINZ AND PROGRESSHUNZ.

Then it was main page retardation style training...15 burpees and 15 wall balls in two minutes, repeated for 10 cycles BECAUSE YOU PAID ME TO SMOKE THESE GURLZ AND MAKE THEM HARD 2 KILL.

You can't make this shit up...

That seems alright to me. it's a general S&C plan. Of course it could be better and individually tailored, but it's HS sports and probably doing no harm.

Why don't you tell her to slack off during this training, and then hire a special coach just for her?

[milosz]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YO5l4J6TRkE[/youtube]

What's the plan if your girls face this catcher's little sister?

[Kazuya Mishima]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YO5l4J6TRkE[/youtube]

What's the plan if your girls face this catcher's little sister?

Ha...yeah, that one is making the rounds. My daughter was actually on the opposite end of that last night in an inter-squad practice game. She was taking the throw as catcher at home plate, and the base runner (her teammate and a retarded senior who barely gets to play in JV games) ran her flat the fuck over like Pete Rose. Very frowned upon in the game of softball. The rules say that she was supposed to slide, and she decided to mow down my daughter who was not blocking the plate, had her eyes on the ball coming in, and was in a completely defenseless position standing straight up. I told my daughter later that night (who can box as well as any teenage boy I ever trained) that if that tubby bitch pulls some shit like that again, consider it "bounty hunting time" and to body her ass right then and there and fuck the consequences.

As for the kid in the video above...she is a complete cunt. There's pushing the boundaries and playing rough, and then there's cheap shot horse shit. I imagine it's not the first time she's done it as she seemed pretty seasoned at it, and probably one of the reasons that video exists...some parent got fed up with that fucking shit and decided to catch her red handed.

I was proud of my kid...she was shaken up pretty bad, but fought it off and defeated the urge to spill the stream of cuss words that she was wanting to let fly. Sports are a forge where iron is made into steel. Yet again, the rules are there to protect folks against needless injury, and it pisses me off when people fail to play by them because of malice, ignorance, or stupidity.

[Beer Jew]

Sports are a forge where iron is made into steel.

It's a game of softball. Not war.

[Kenny X]

The Future Mrs. Kenny X is an Educator. She teaches 5th., 6th., 7th. and 8th. grade kids. She also works with high school kids. Physical fitness, and competition in physical sports are important to her as well. But I am certain that she would agree with my assertion that parents ought to be more concerned with how well their children were learning Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic, than what their VO2 max is.

Let's face it, folks. Our kids don't stand much of a chance of being Pro, or even D-1 athletes, no matter how hard we smoke them in the gym, and no matter how hard we make them practice. It's a low order of probability, kids growing up to be elite level athletes.

Now, that doesn't mean that kids shouldn't train, play sports, and have fun doing so, because they should. By all means! It is important to raise healthy, fit, strong kids.

But it's more important to raise kids who are smart. Because sooner or later, the 98% of kids who don't end up being elite level athletes will have to find meaningful work.

When I become a parent, hopefully soon, my kid will indeed spend time on the mat, and in the gym. But it'll be for fun, and for just being healthy. And the child will study, because for me, as a parent, his or her brain will take precedence.

[TerryB]

Sports are a forge where iron is made into steel.

It's a game of softball. Not war.

Naileeeeeed it!

I'm not sure what's worse, that people are crying about a bump at home plate, or that some dickface made a dramatic video about a kid's softball game and it's actually circulating around the internet, surely spawning intense debate here and there.

Crossfit S&C is the least of our worries, m8s.

:factoid

[Kazuya Mishima]

Sports are a forge where iron is made into steel.

It's a game of softball. Not war.

You're right...softball is a vehicle to teach values, teamwork, sportsmanship, responsibility & accountability, the value of hard work, etc.

War is just bullshit and the worst side of humanity.

What's your fucking point?

[milosz]

Sports are a forge where iron is made into steel.

It's a game of softball. Not war.

Naileeeeeed it!

I'm not sure what's worse, that people are crying about a bump at home plate, or that some dickface made a dramatic video about a kid's softball game and it's actually circulating around the internet, surely spawning intense debate here and there.

Crossfit S&C is the least of our worries, m8s.

:factoid

Eh, if it was a rough tackle in soccer no one would be too upset, but you could theoretically fuck a girl up pretty good throwing an elbow for no reason related to the game.

[TerryB]

Sports are a forge where iron is made into steel.

It's a game of softball. Not war.

Naileeeeeed it!

I'm not sure what's worse, that people are crying about a bump at home plate, or that some dickface made a dramatic video about a kid's softball game and it's actually circulating around the internet, surely spawning intense debate here and there.

Crossfit S&C is the least of our worries, m8s.

:factoid

Eh, if it was a rough tackle in soccer no one would be too upset, but you could theoretically fuck a girl up pretty good throwing an elbow for no reason related to the game.

Oh no!

[syaigh]

Update:

Yesterday it was squats with 70% of the 1RM they took last week BECAUSE NOVICE GIRLS WHO STARTED LIFTING LAST WEEK NEED PERCENTAGE BASED PROGRAMS IN ORDER TO TRIGGER TEH GAINZ AND PROGRESSHUNZ.

Then it was main page retardation style training...15 burpees and 15 wall balls in two minutes, repeated for 10 cycles BECAUSE YOU PAID ME TO SMOKE THESE GURLZ AND MAKE THEM HARD 2 KILL.

You can't make this shit up...

That seems alright to me. it's a general S&C plan. Of course it could be better and individually tailored, but it's HS sports and probably doing no harm.

Why don't you tell her to slack off during this training, and then hire a special coach just for her?

No. Its retarded.

You know, most S&C coaches had to go to college. You'd think it would require them to think and learn. But, it doesn't. There are no apprenticeships in this field. I've been in some gyms/athletic facilities teaching interns. Its the blind leading the blind.

Percentages are bullshit until basic skills are mastered. SEriously. I've trained a lot of teenage weightlifters and powerlifters. Never using the percentages. Ever. Until they've been trianing 6-12 months.

Its absolute bullshit.

There is actual science that supports how strength training happens and its not this way. This way is because people are too lazy, stupid, and arrogant to listen to people who know what they are talking about and go for the sexy/shiny/flashy doubletalk.

In other words, in S&C, like everything else in physical training, it comes down to marketing and not good practices

If I ever encountered this bullshit, I'd be ripping someone a new one and letting that gym owner know exactly why he was a menace to society. SEriously. Bullshit. Complete and utter bullshit.

[johno]

parents ought to be more concerned with how well their children were learning Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic, than what their VO2 max is.

Let's face it, folks. Our kids don't stand much of a chance of being Pro, or even D-1 athletes, no matter how hard we smoke them in the gym, and no matter how hard we make them practice. It's a low order of probability, kids growing up to be elite level athletes.

It's been a shock to talk to so many parents who seem only interested in Junior's sports performance. Not a mention of academic success.
I guess this shows I don't hang out with Asian Tiger Moms.

[bennyonesix]

There is a, and I shit you not, Chinese American Community Center Montessori Academy right near me.

I dare not imagine what happens behind those tall and ornate wooden doors.

[Kenny X]

parents ought to be more concerned with how well their children were learning Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic, than what their VO2 max is.

Let's face it, folks. Our kids don't stand much of a chance of being Pro, or even D-1 athletes, no matter how hard we smoke them in the gym, and no matter how hard we make them practice. It's a low order of probability, kids growing up to be elite level athletes.

It's been a shock to talk to so many parents who seem only interested in Junior's sports performance. Not a mention of academic success.
I guess this shows I don't hang out with Asian Tiger Moms.

I think a lot of it has to do with people pushing their own unrealized dreams of being an amazing sports god on their kids.

They're doing their children a horrible disservice.

[Shafpocalypse Now]

I know of 2-3 instances where someone attempted to use XF for youth sports as conditioning and they turned out very mediocre.

2 soccer and 1 lax team. In both cases, the poor kids couldn't run long and fast enough to play for their first game.

[Kazuya Mishima]

I guess this is 70% week. Today was 70% of 1RM on the front squat. Many of the girls (including my oldest) don't have the flexibility to hold the bar in the elbows up, clean position per Pope Glassman dogma and this is fucking with their wrists. Couch doesn't know how to accommodate by teaching hands crossed grip or using lengths of strap. Only knows weekend cert material and main page fuckery, I suppose.

Followed up with a fuck ton of high repetition bodyweight squats, ring rows, and something else I don't recall (I think I went face down in my spaghetti in disgust).

[johno]

parents ought to be more concerned with how well their children were learning Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic, than what their VO2 max is.

Let's face it, folks. Our kids don't stand much of a chance of being Pro, or even D-1 athletes, no matter how hard we smoke them in the gym, and no matter how hard we make them practice. It's a low order of probability, kids growing up to be elite level athletes.

It's been a shock to talk to so many parents who seem only interested in Junior's sports performance. Not a mention of academic success.
I guess this shows I don't hang out with Asian Tiger Moms.

I think a lot of it has to do with people pushing their own unrealized dreams of being an amazing sports god on their kids.

They're doing their children a horrible disservice.

Maybe this is why we need immigrants: Doing the brainwork Americans won't do.

[Kenny X]

parents ought to be more concerned with how well their children were learning Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic, than what their VO2 max is.

Let's face it, folks. Our kids don't stand much of a chance of being Pro, or even D-1 athletes, no matter how hard we smoke them in the gym, and no matter how hard we make them practice. It's a low order of probability, kids growing up to be elite level athletes.

It's been a shock to talk to so many parents who seem only interested in Junior's sports performance. Not a mention of academic success.
I guess this shows I don't hang out with Asian Tiger Moms.

I think a lot of it has to do with people pushing their own unrealized dreams of being an amazing sports god on their kids.

They're doing their children a horrible disservice.

Maybe this is why we need immigrants: Doing the brainwork Americans won't do.

It's not just brainwork. Immigrants of all shapes, sizes, and diaspora do all kinds of work, from landscaping and other shit jobs that we just don't want to do, to engineering work that we're just not smart enough to because our priorities are so fucked up and our public education system is sliding down the learning curve like the Banana Splits.

[bennyonesix]

parents ought to be more concerned with how well their children were learning Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic, than what their VO2 max is.

Let's face it, folks. Our kids don't stand much of a chance of being Pro, or even D-1 athletes, no matter how hard we smoke them in the gym, and no matter how hard we make them practice. It's a low order of probability, kids growing up to be elite level athletes.

It's been a shock to talk to so many parents who seem only interested in Junior's sports performance. Not a mention of academic success.
I guess this shows I don't hang out with Asian Tiger Moms.

I think a lot of it has to do with people pushing their own unrealized dreams of being an amazing sports god on their kids.

They're doing their children a horrible disservice.

Maybe this is why we need immigrants: Doing the brainwork Americans won't do.

It's not just brainwork. Immigrants of all shapes, sizes, and diaspora do all kinds of work, from landscaping and other shit jobs that we just don't want to do, to engineering work that we're just not smart enough to because our priorities are so fucked up and our public education system is sliding down the learning curve like the Banana Splits.

I just lost my fucking mind. Jobs we don't want to do? Let go of Turds Corporatist cock for a second. Fucking Mexican Nationals roll up and start a wage race to the bottom for any decent construction or landscaping job... There are tens of thousands of jobs that used to support whole families that are now shit because of that downward pressure. It's our fault that Foreign Nationals are flooding in by the millions on millions and turning the damn country into a 3rd world nation? Jesus man. What?

Oh wait I forgot FREE MARKET FOR THE GAINZ.

[Kenny X]

parents ought to be more concerned with how well their children were learning Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic, than what their VO2 max is.

Let's face it, folks. Our kids don't stand much of a chance of being Pro, or even D-1 athletes, no matter how hard we smoke them in the gym, and no matter how hard we make them practice. It's a low order of probability, kids growing up to be elite level athletes.

It's been a shock to talk to so many parents who seem only interested in Junior's sports performance. Not a mention of academic success.
I guess this shows I don't hang out with Asian Tiger Moms.

I think a lot of it has to do with people pushing their own unrealized dreams of being an amazing sports god on their kids.

They're doing their children a horrible disservice.

Maybe this is why we need immigrants: Doing the brainwork Americans won't do.

It's not just brainwork. Immigrants of all shapes, sizes, and diaspora do all kinds of work, from landscaping and other shit jobs that we just don't want to do, to engineering work that we're just not smart enough to because our priorities are so fucked up and our public education system is sliding down the learning curve like the Banana Splits.

I just lost my fucking mind. Jobs we don't want to do? Let go of Turds Corporatist cock for a second. Fucking Mexican Nationals roll up and start a wage race to the bottom for any decent construction or landscaping job... There are tens of thousands of jobs that used to support whole families that are now shit because of that downward pressure. It's our fault that Foreign Nationals are flooding in by the millions on millions and turning the damn country into a 3rd world nation? Jesus man. What?

Oh wait I forgot FREE MARKET FOR THE GAINZ.

Dude, there are Americans right now, who work at McDonalds, and are unsatisfied with the wages they earn. But instead of doing something positive about it, like, uh, I dunno, what I did when I was unsatisfied with the $7/hr I was earning at $tarbucks Coffee, which was- teach myself how to program computers and get a better job in IT and work my ass off, they're bleating about how they want a pay raise to $15/hr.

The Mexicans who wash dishes, mow lawns, paint houses and do the shitwork at the construction site aren't The Problem. The Indians who get hired for all the engineering jobs aren't The Problem.

And neither is the Free Market System.

The Problem, is lazy, entitled Americans who were made that way by our increasingly namby-pamby, feel-good, we're all special, throw-away junk culture.