IGX

Absolutely horrible. Even if my expectations had been lower, I still would have been dissappointed. This is the type of thing I would have turned off mid-way through if it was a rental.

The first 20 minutes was absolutely bad-fucking-ass. After that, it gives up quicker than a 16yo boy on top of Mila Kunis. If they had made the entire 2 hours like the first 20 minutes and called it Black Machete it would have been pure WIN.

The storytelling is uneven. I didn't really like Denzel, and I didn't entirely dislike Oldman. Mila Kunis looked like a dustmop. The action is unrealistic and non-sensical at times. Several times I was like "ok, why did that happen like that." The behavior of the characters is not consistent...Oldman's right-hand man morphs from a hardass that will shoot his own man in the face for failure, to a merciful gentleman who can't bring himself to shoot Denzel, and then finally comes out as a softy who is carrying a flame for Mila's character. It's just ridiculous.

The twist ending is nice in concept and would have made Rod Serling proud, but it's pulled off with such a total lack of grace and style that it's unforgivable. Most of the actors seemed to realize that this was a piece of shit about halfway through and just dialed it in. Oldman was not at his best.

The style and setting reminded me of Fallout 3. I should have just stayed home and played that.

The bolo work he did was SWEET...the time spent training with Inosanto and Imada paid off and is one of the few highpoints of the film. Unfortunately, it's all loaded at the front of the film, and they overdid it a bit with him just blazing through a dozen guys at a time and lopping off heads like blowing out a candle. A little too much, imo.