The couch thread

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tzg
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Re: The couch thread

Post by tzg »

Gin Master wrote:Reebok @F Gaymes? If Reebok is promoting the Gaymes, then the local yokels can say bye bye to all their local dick swinging contests. There's no way in hell that Reebok is going to front marketing dollars for the big events and let affiliates hold their own contests without getting anything.

@Fers think "no way Couch could be stupid enough to make a deal with Reebok without getting professional advice." Well, folks, he is. There are no business people on HQ's payroll. Cousin Vinny is running the "legal" department, and the rest of the office is filled with Couch loyalists.

Affiliates, you are worried and you should be. Saran said that he was going to post a lengthy writeup in the affiliate section of the @F Forum. Send it to us so we can put it up here and tell you what you need to be afraid of.

Shit, there are more good attorneys posting on the Couch thread everyday than Couch had with him at the Reebok meeting. I imagine the meeting went something like this:
I'm going to beg to differ. Couch has been playing the long game pretty well here. He had opportunities to cash out on the cheap and he, quite wisely, waited it out. I would wager good money that he retained outside counsel and didn't get taken for a ride. He's monetizing the shit out of this. Say what you will about Couch, but you don't get from being the minor fitness figure he was at the beginning of the thread to where he is now (thousands of affiliates) despite all the flaws documented at the beginning of this thread without having some acumen.

I'm divided about the local competition thing. On the one hand, it promotes the brand of "CrossFit as a sport", but, on the other, they're "unsanctioned" competitions running alongside "sanctioned" competitions, which they might, understandably, want to reign in.


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Re: The couch thread

Post by TerryB »

tzg wrote: Couch has been playing the long game pretty well here. He had opportunities to cash out on the cheap and he, quite wisely, waited it out. I would wager good money that he retained outside counsel and didn't get taken for a ride. He's monetizing the shit out of this. Say what you will about Couch, but you don't get from being the minor fitness figure he was at the beginning of the thread to where he is now (thousands of affiliates) despite all the flaws documented at the beginning of this thread without having some acumen.
Mostly agree. He's a huckster through and through and a good huckster usually makes pretty good bank (before getting indicted/convicted of tax evasion, etc).
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Gin Master
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Gin Master »

tzg wrote:
Gin Master wrote:Reebok @F Gaymes? If Reebok is promoting the Gaymes, then the local yokels can say bye bye to all their local dick swinging contests. There's no way in hell that Reebok is going to front marketing dollars for the big events and let affiliates hold their own contests without getting anything.

@Fers think "no way Couch could be stupid enough to make a deal with Reebok without getting professional advice." Well, folks, he is. There are no business people on HQ's payroll. Cousin Vinny is running the "legal" department, and the rest of the office is filled with Couch loyalists.

Affiliates, you are worried and you should be. Saran said that he was going to post a lengthy writeup in the affiliate section of the @F Forum. Send it to us so we can put it up here and tell you what you need to be afraid of.

Shit, there are more good attorneys posting on the Couch thread everyday than Couch had with him at the Reebok meeting. I imagine the meeting went something like this:
I'm going to beg to differ. Couch has been playing the long game pretty well here. He had opportunities to cash out on the cheap and he, quite wisely, waited it out. I would wager good money that he retained outside counsel and didn't get taken for a ride. He's monetizing the shit out of this. Say what you will about Couch, but you don't get from being the minor fitness figure he was at the beginning of the thread to where he is now (thousands of affiliates) despite all the flaws documented at the beginning of this thread without having some acumen.

I'm divided about the local competition thing. On the one hand, it promotes the brand of "CrossFit as a sport", but, on the other, they're "unsanctioned" competitions running alongside "sanctioned" competitions, which they might, understandably, want to reign in.
That would make sense if you assume that Couch intended for this thing to grow like this. All the posturing and bullshit (@F is for garage gyms; we will never sell out) sounds like a dude who figures he might run this thing up to $500K/yr and get his picture taken. Despite Couch's hubris, I can't see him envisioning the runaway success of his cult. Indeed, this has taken off because of the "community," not the workouts.

I know for a fact that, as @F grew, Couch promoted from within rather than hiring business people to run operations. That's why they have fumbled around the past couple years despite raking in the dollars. I'm not privy to what's going on now, but it's hard to believe that Couch lets anyone tell him what to do. Lauren, on the other hand (who purportedly owns the majority of the company) is probably shrewd enough to have hired outside counsel. Hard to say.

All we know now is that 1) @F, properly managed, is a goldmine, 2) Couch is a huckster marketing genius, 3) the GWF will get into bed with any corporation that will cover his tab and float him some gin credits.

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GoDogGo!
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Re: The couch thread

Post by GoDogGo! »

Gin Master wrote:7. wallet chains
8. whey protein marked up 5000%
9. designer restoratives
10. Tactical penicillin
11. Faux-hawk styling gel
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badatcomputer
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Re: The couch thread

Post by badatcomputer »

Did the take it down already?

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friedquads
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Re: The couch thread

Post by friedquads »

badatcomputer wrote:
Did the take it down already?
The job just pulled a McCheeze and DNF'ed.
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Re: The couch thread

Post by CultBuster »

In 2011, PROGENEX will be passing the torch to Reebok as lead sponsor of the CrossFit Games. With the new Reebok-sponsored purse jumping up to a cool $1 million, the future of the sport is looking bright.
Some fucktard will be getting seven figures this year?

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baffled
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Re: The couch thread

Post by baffled »

Fuck I hope these douchebags don't start getting that much money. Although a $1 million purse sounds like that would be divided among only those who place. If someone "wins" this thing and walks away with seven figures, how long is it until Drew Rosenhaus starts signing these assholes and they start contracting them to compete?

On a better note. Gorilla, your Thursday edition is fwap-tastic. Tuesday was actually a little scary though.
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WildGorillaMan
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Re: The couch thread

Post by WildGorillaMan »

Confused wrote:Fuck I hope these douchebags don't start getting that much money. Although a $1 million purse sounds like that would be divided among only those who place. If someone "wins" this thing and walks away with seven figures, how long is it until Drew Rosenhaus starts signing these assholes and they start contracting them to compete?

On a better note. Gorilla, your Thursday edition is fwap-tastic. Tuesday was actually a little scary though.
Wait'll you see what I have in store for you for Friday.

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Mountebank
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Mountebank »

Today's mainpage post is a real doozy.
http://www.crossfit.com/mt-archive2/007281.html
Three rounds for time of:
10 Muscle-ups
10 Forward rolls
20 One legged squats, alternating
Handstand walk 20 yards
Yeah, those are somersaults, like little kids do. #-o I can only imagine what's going to happen when people are doing these for time...puking will be the mildest of these options, I'd think.

Next, Louie Simmons is still OBVIOUSLY "doing @F", because he advocates rotating exercises:
http://journal.crossfit.com/2010/12/louieconj1.tpl
“Tomorrow, I have no idea what I’ll be doing (in the gym),” Louie Simmons says during this special lecture.

He’s talking about the conjugate system, which has athletes constantly changing the exercises they do to prevent accommodation and overtraining. The conjugate system is one of the cornerstones of Westside Barbell training, and Simmons has used it to produce a host of top powerlifters who are constantly getting stronger and breaking records.
Not that anyone here needs this, but the lurkers might want to read this and see that nowhere is the word "random" used, because random training (without specific goal or purpose) is retarded: The Conjugate Method, By: Louie Simmons
](*,) ](*,) ](*,)

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Shafpocalypse Now
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Shafpocalypse Now »

The ensuing saga of the PROGENIX scandal. This time he's not proving that the new PROGENIX is simple whey protein, but posting the marginal Darren Meade's restraining order against his ex-girlfriend.

Do you want to buy the stuff this asshole is trying to sell you?

http://www.steroidtimes.com/darren-mead ... order/2010


TerryB
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Re: The couch thread

Post by TerryB »

He’s talking about the conjugate system, which has athletes constantly changing the exercises they do
THAT'S why they don't do waves or 3-4 week cycles anymore. ... oh wait ...
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Mountebank
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Mountebank »

protobuilder wrote:
He’s talking about the conjugate system, which has athletes constantly changing the exercises they do
THAT'S why they don't do waves or 3-4 week cycles anymore. ... oh wait ...
Not to disparage Louie's accomplishments at all, but is he even still competing or doing things personally that should make people concerned with what HE is doing versus what his actively-competing athletes are doing? I would bet that his guys have a pretty damn good idea of what tomorrow's workout is going to look like!

I mean, what about all the people who base their workouts on what couch himself does? Oh wait...

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Jag Panzer
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Jag Panzer »

Quackmire wrote:I mean, what about all the people who base their workouts on what couch himself does? Oh wait...
I did Couch's personal WOD through most of my twenties, and I mean it was fun, but I'm not gonna say it builds eleet fitness. Maybe eleet hangovers.


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Re: The couch thread

Post by The man in black »

Louie Simmons is competing this weekend.


TerryB
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Re: The couch thread

Post by TerryB »

The man in black wrote:Louie Simmons is competing this weekend.
When is Couch's next competition?
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Yes, I'm drunk
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Yes, I'm drunk »

protobuilder wrote:
The man in black wrote:Louie Simmons is competing this weekend.
When is Couch's next competition?
There's a drink-a-thon at my local Yates' Wine Lodge tonight. If I could enter Couch as a ringer I think he'd have a good chance of placing. He might be a DNF though. Not because he couldn't finish drinking per se, but because he just wouldn't fucking stop.....

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Re: The couch thread

Post by The Nightman »

protobuilder wrote:
The man in black wrote:Louie Simmons is competing this weekend.
When is Couch's next competition?

Every Thursday.


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Re: The couch thread

Post by powerlifter54 »

Yes, I'm drunk wrote: He might be a DNF though. Not because he couldn't finish drinking per se, but because he just wouldn't fucking stop.....

=D> =D> =D> =D>

Well played, Mauer!
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Re: The couch thread

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Last edited by ... on Fri Aug 26, 2011 11:26 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Jay
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Re: The couch thread

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Steggy
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Steggy »

http://www.board.crossfit.com/showpost. ... stcount=36
Censoring is what china does, not crossfit.
He has a lot to learn.


Mountebank
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Re: The couch thread

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syaigh
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Re: The couch thread

Post by syaigh »

Bigger LOL is how SICFIT responds. (And the comments)

Hey guys! How long are you going to continue to do "NOT-@fit" and defend @fit, which is not what you do?

Grow some balls and launch your own movement that is reflective of what you actually do. Of course, I realize that SICFIT is probably doing this, just in stages. Ie, sway the masses, and then lead them to the new holy land.

Or do like the rest of us who used to do @fit and now do "NOT-@fit" and just move on and don't call it anything except "good training".

Seriously, is your goal to call all fitness @fit if it includes more than one exercise method? If that's the case, well then, Zumba is @fit. BodyPump is @fit. Its just more cardio focused rather than strength focused. How can you not see this?

By riding the name out, you're just making something that most of you AREN'T EVEN DOING more popular.

Its hard to leave the party, I guess . . .
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tzg
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Re: The couch thread

Post by tzg »

The goal is to promote the brand and cash in on the brand. The strength of the brand isn't "CrossFit programming" these days, whatever that is, it's the "community".

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